


Beloved Memories, in Notes [UNDER REVISION]

by mimiplaysgames



Series: Strength to Protect the Things That Matter [2]
Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Adventure, Best Friends, Childhood, Childhood Friends, Disney References, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Falling In Love, Final Fantasy References, First Kiss, First Meetings, Fluff, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Hurt/Comfort, Kingdom Hearts Headcanons, Mutual Pining, Pre-Canon, Pre-Relationship, Sexual Tension, Some angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-11
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-05-05 06:11:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 39,661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14611248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mimiplaysgames/pseuds/mimiplaysgames
Summary: There is no mistaking that Aqua and Terra have been through a lot together. This is leaflet of stories that depict camaraderie, friendship, and love as Terra and Aqua grow up, make mistakes, and learn together. Being in love with your best friend isn't easy when trying to be a Keyblade Master.A collection of one-shots that cover stories and headcanons of Terra and Aqua's budding relationship. Set in Pre-Birth by Sleep.Ratings vary between K-T. The last chapter will be rated M.





	1. Volume I: A Tale of Awareness

**Author's Note:**

> This series will be a supplement to my longform fic, Strength to Protect the Things That Matter. However, it is not necessary to read that fic in order to enjoy this. But consider that this acts like a prequel and so lots of things from this will be referenced! For readers of my other fic, this series should enrich that experience, especially those wanting more fluff or backstory. 
> 
> The photographs-in-book scene was written to James Horner’s “Flying Forward in Time,” from We’re Back! A Dinosaur’s Tale.  
> Aqua’s gift scene was written to Daniel Licht’s “The Wedding,” from Dexter Season 2/3.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aqua and Terra have been friends for a long time, endlessly practicing and studying for the cultivation of their efforts - the title of Keyblade Master. While their relationship has always been comfortable and close, Aqua realizes that the way she has been seeing him has been changing. Now, she is left with trying to define what that means.
> 
> Rating: T

It was the aroma of the ginger tea and his touch that awoke her. 

Aqua had slumped over a desk in the library, on top of an open book when Terra stopped by with some of his own brewed mixture. He rustled through her hair to wake her. 

She took a sharp inhale, rubbed her eyes, and found the tea that he offered her. He shook his head gently with a _tsk-tsk_ , as though to say that she was being naughty by sleeping on her studies.

But this was always their flow. Genuine support for each other that hid behind constant teasing. 

Aqua gave a slight hum as she drank it, which was strong in the kick of flavor, and she was grateful he brought it to her. Yet this was to be expected. He always brought her tea late at night. 

“Where is Ven?” she asked.

“Out slaying some dragon.” He took a seat in front of her.

“I think I’m too tired for your sass, tonight,” she said, her voice raspy.

Terra let out a soft laugh. “In his dreams, tucked away in his bed.” He smiled at her, and this woke her up a little more than the tea did.

He brought a couple of his own books and opened one, although he paid no attention to it.

“Whatever you were reading must have been so exciting,” he said.

Aqua placed her hand on the page she was on and closed the book to reveal a large leather cover with carved designs. 

“ _The Affairs of the Heart_ ,” she read. 

“How romantic.” His eyes were focused on the page in front of him, but his attention was clearly somewhere else.

“Like you’d know. Have you even read this one? It’s one of our mandatories.”

Terra looked up at her, his gaze focused and confident. He had that small, adorable smirk she always knew him to carry whenever he was going to start getting cocky. 

“ _Ye heart is delicate and tangible, and thou must lifteth ye Key-sword bequeathed to ye in honor, for thy Key-sword shall ne’er be wielded to perform betwixt lyght and dark_ ,” he said as he enunciated his words in order to sound fancy.

Aqua tried to control her laughter but it came out instead as a snort. 

“ _And all ye Key-sword bless-ed shall journey on behalf of the lyght, yea verily, and bringeth peace instilled upon all thine hearts shared_ ,” he continued as she laughed.

“That sounds pretty much right,” she said. 

“I guess so, I think I made half of that up.”

“You want to see what I found?” she asked, her eyes lighting up. She grabbed a book from a stack that she built next to her. Terra took the same mug he offered her and drank a large gulp. 

She sifted through the pages and then turned the book towards him.

“Look at this,” she said as she pointed to a specific spice among a list of them. 

Terra tried to read the word out loud, but had trouble with it.

“Turmeric,” she corrected. “Apparently, I can make a cake with this.” 

He was intrigued. “A spice cake?”

Aqua relished at his interest, always needing an opportunity to share this kind of excitement with him.

“Yes! And look here. There is this interesting spice...” she turned the book back towards her. “Hy-sso-pus. Hyssopus. It seems like I can use this one to mix with others for our meat dishes or something.”

She continued. “Oh! And another one...” She quickly turned some pages. “Annatto.”

“Where would you find all of these?” He set the mug down.

Aqua sighed. “Somewhere out there.” She gestured with her head to the stars outside the large, ornate windows of the library. “It would probably take me _years_ to find them, but I would _love_ to be able to play with them now.”

Terra let out a small half-sigh, half-chuckle. “Maybe when you are allowed to go on your own missions next year, you’ll have the time to search for them.”

Terra was eighteen, while Aqua was seventeen. They had just passed their preliminary exams, and were on their way to take their Mark of Mastery the next year. For now, he was allowed to go on missions by himself because he was older. 

Aqua smiled as she leaned onto both of her hands. “You nervous about your first mission?”

Terra let his mouth hang, carefully considering his words.

“We’ll see how I feel tomorrow,” he finally said.

* * *

The next morning, Aqua and Ventus waited in the castle foyer, hoping to get a chance to give Terra a good-luck parting. 

It seemed like forever before he finally made his way to say good-bye. 

“What’s the mission?” Ventus asked excitedly. 

Terra held up a small card with some notes. “I have to keep watch over a mother elephant and her calf who are working in an abusive circus.”

“That sounds pretty easy, you got this!” Ventus said, his eyes glistening. He had always thought of Terra as the most amazing person he had ever met. 

“I’m sure you’ll do great,” Aqua said. It did sound easy, and she suspected there was probably a lesson behind it as well if the Master chose this for him. “Do you know how long you’ll be gone?”

“Long enough to get the job done,” Terra said as he exhaled slowly. 

Which shouldn’t take that long. As he boarded his glider and drifted off to the sky, Aqua took notice of the silence left behind once she couldn’t hear the hum of his flying anymore. _It will probably be just a day or two. No big deal._

That presence stayed with her, however. There was suddenly no one to study with her late at night when Ventus was asleep. No one to distract her from those books and start conversations that could sometimes last for hours. She made breakfast for one less person. She sparred more often with Ventus, who was skilled enough to keep up with her. 

However, her equal wasn’t there to challenge her when she needed it. 

He wasn’t there to joke about her faltering form when she tried to counter his incredibly strong attacks. He wasn’t there to try to psyche her out with his incessant provoking. He wasn’t there to give her earnest praises every time they finished a duel, or discuss techniques to get better.

Ventus teased her as well, but the way it was done with Terra was different. For a friend that she has known since she was eight, growing up with him meant  she knew every twitch he showed on his face. It meant she understood him perfectly well, possibly better than he understood himself. They used to be inseparable. 

But it wasn’t just that. On the third night he was gone, when she brewed her own tea and didn’t like the taste of it, she caught herself thinking of his deep-blue eyes and strong jawline. _I’m being silly. He’ll be back soon. There’s no need for this..._

The morning after, she looked outside the window from the foyer, to see him flying back. Her heart beating on her chest and a smile beaming on her face, she ran over to the entrance, but stopped short after what she witnessed.

Terra stormed into the castle, his eyes red. He looked at her for just a moment, a look of complete despair on his face, and he continued on without breaking his stride or saying anything to her.

She followed him to the library.

“Terra, what happened?”

Terra threw some books onto their table, and opened one while he maniacally flipped through some pages.

“I just need to study a little,” he said curtly.

_Just like him to get distant and snarky when he got upset._

“What good is studying going to do for you now?” she asked.

“Just... something...” Frustrated, desperate.

“... What happened to the elephants?”

The question made him stop his frantic search through his books, and he took a deep inhale. It looked as though he was trying to stop himself from crying.

“I agreed to work for the circus,” he said, his voice shaking. “I made sure I was tasked at taking care of them. And I did. I took care of her, made sure she was fed and clean. The little one felt comfortable around me and we played everyday.”

He put his hand to his face as he continued. “But the little one was born with very... large ears. Some kids were picking on him during a show, and the mother got _so_ _upset_.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “She attacked the humans in defense of her baby. I understood why, and I tried to stop her. I tried to help my co-workers stop her, but...” 

He turned around and leaned back on the table, his hands splayed out over the surface. “The ringleader decided to separate them. They locked her up in all of these chains. She couldn’t even walk in her cage.” He regained some composure to keep his voice calm. “They made the little one into a clown. To be made fun of every night while he food was thrown at him. He won’t even play with me anymore.”

Aqua didn’t realize her eyes were watering. She walked over to his side, and leaned back on the table with him. 

“What kind of monster would do that to a mother?” he said.

“You’re right, he’s a monster.” She knew how sensitive Terra was. He was strong, and he was optimistic about his endeavors, and probably a _little_ too often he would overestimate his abilities. These kinds of events were things that Terra always took so personally.

“They are so lucky they have someone like you to care about them,” she said softly. “You’ll find a way to help them. But you won’t find the answer in these books.”

Terra kept his gaze towards the floor, refusing to look at her. It wasn’t just that he was sensitive. She knew that he often felt embarrassed over his failures, as if it would taint his reputation. Not that he needed to impress her of all people, but it didn’t make sense that he felt he should anyway.

He looked utterly defeated. He whispered, “what is the Master going to say?”

There wasn’t a good answer to that, except to gently put her hand over his. She wanted him to relax, and realized that she was the one who couldn’t when she felt his thumb hold her fingers. The movement made her stomach flutter, as if she yearned for the touch. She missed him, yes, but this much?

She squeezed him a little, which prompted him to turn his hand upward so that she can hold it. His hand was warm, and she saw him lean toward her, although he kept his stare towards the floor. 

Her thoughts lingered on his touch. They had held hands before, plenty of times in fact. Mostly to guide each other when they were hiking dangerous terrain, or when they were children so that they wouldn’t get separated. 

They actually used to touch each other much more often. They used to wrestle when they played. As they got older though, that became awkward. He would call it less appropriate, and never initiated it again. By that point, they were older and were more interested in perfecting their fighting techniques, so it wasn’t something either of them missed.

It didn’t register to her how long they had been holding hands in silence until she heard the Master walk into the library. 

“Terra,” he called out.

Terra quickly slipped his hand out of hers as he faced his Master, his posture erect in military style. 

“Yes, Master.” He had wiped any evidence of sadness or anxiety from his voice, as he usually did to appear like he was in control.

“We shall talk in my office,” Eraqus said before leaving the library. 

“Yes, sir,” Terra said as he followed.

Aqua leaned on that table by herself, looking at her hand while her heart beat a little harder.

* * *

“How did Terra _not_ beat that guy up?” Ventus asked as Aqua filled him in about the ringleader. The two were dusting the hallways of the second floor. Every day there was a chore to do. It couldn’t be helped in a castle so large with so little residents. 

“How is he, anyway?” he asked her.

Aqua shook her head. “You know what he’s like. He’s completely wrecked over the calf.”

Terra had been in the Master’s office for quite a while now, and the chores were a distraction when they grew tired of waiting for him. It took a couple of hours before they finally finished, and thought to take a break outside. It was then that they saw him head down the entrance hall and out the front entrance.

“Terra!” Ventus called out, but it was too late as the doors slammed shut. “He didn’t even say goodbye.” 

Normally he would, so what happened?

Aqua walked downstairs as Ventus followed, to see the Master standing there. 

“Master?” she asked.

“I have instructed Terra to not come back until his mission to free the elephants is complete,” Eraqus said, walking back toward his office as though nothing pressing had happened. 

"Sir?” she asked after him.

“He needs to learn to juggle his setbacks. Life is not always going to be easy for him, especially as a Keyblade bearer.” He wrapped his hands behind his back, pensive but strong on his word in a hierarchy where what he said was law. There wasn’t a point to stand up to him. 

And an order like that wouldn’t make Terra feel any better about himself. 

“You’re such a worry wort,” Ventus said, breaking the silence as she stood there thinking to herself.

“Don’t tell me you aren’t.”

“Just a little, but it’s Terra. He can handle it. I swear, your worrying is going to bite back at you hard one day.”

* * *

Aqua gazed out the window of the library four days later, sitting on her usual spot, with the same open book - but unable to concentrate. The day was bright and the sky full of clouds, yet there was no overcast. A good day to spend outside instead of stuffing her mind with words, but she preferred to finished her responsibilities guilt-free. She just wasn’t doing a good job of that.

Ventus sat across from her. The seat directly in front of her was too special, too reserved for Terra, for him to take it. He also had an open book and attempted to finish an essay. Instead, he just fiddled with the pen, and it smacked against the table over and over.

“ _Ugh_ , Aqua, save me from myself.” Ventus tossed the pen aside.

“You really need to learn a bit of patience.”

“ _You really need to learn a bit of patience_.” His voice became shrill so he could pass as sounding like a girl. “I should be rewarded for spending at least ten minutes reading this stupid thing. It’s so much better when Master reads things to me.”

He looked at the book she was reading, with its archaic language. “I _really_ don’t look forward to reading _that_ ,” he said. A moment of silence, and then he stood up from his chair. “I’m going to train a little.”

“Ven.”

“Just for, like, ten minutes. I can’t stand sitting here any longer.”

Aqua shook her head as he walked away. It meant that her, or in the usual case Terra when he was still around, would have to sit with him at the last minute to finish the essay before the deadline.

Alone, she had nothing else to do but to tend to her book, finding a flow so she could let the words pass by. She didn’t bother to check the time when she heard footsteps behind her. 

“You done procrastinating, Ven?” she called out, only to see Terra stand in front of her with a mug of tea, and a large stain on his shirt.

“As you can see,” he said as he pulled on the fabric, “Ven already assaulted me with a hug, with not a _care in the world_ what I was holding.” He gave his usually sheepish smile, in so much better spirits than the last time she saw him.

“Terra!” The surprise was well-welcomed, and she knew she had the goofiest grin across her face. But she didn’t care. “You have to tell me how it went!”

He sat in front of her. Finally, a sense of normalcy. 

His response was a smile, and she said, “so it went well?”

He nodded. “I tried to get him out of his shell. I even helped him visit his mother, although I had to cut it short. It was awful, taking him away from her. But eventually, I got him to open up after... well...” he shrugged a little, his eyes darting around like he was about to admit a secret. “Is it bad to get an elephant a _little_ drunk?”

“Terra!” 

“It was an accident, I promise.” He held his hand up as if he was vowing. “But it worked,” he added, searching the library for anyone who might have been listening in.

Aqua took the mug he set aside for himself and sipped his tea. Delicious. Things were finally back to where they belong. 

“Anyway, they are back together,” he said. “Mother and calf. He became an overnight sensation with a new act we setup together and they are out of the circus and are onward to better show business.”

“That’s so wonderful. What did you guys plan?” She took another sip.

“It wasn’t me, really, it was _him_. He can fly. Now I can say that I’ve seen just about everything.”

She nearly spit the tea out. “ _Terra_. A flying elephant? Ridiculous.” Always him to be making fun of her even when she seriously needed to hear good news. 

Terra’s eyes widened as he laughed out loud. “You don’t believe me?”

“A flying elephant, sure. And I can breathe underwater.”

He leaned forward a bit, his eyes narrowing with a cocky smirk across his face. “Want to bet? I demand you make me that beef pastry I love when I prove you wrong.”

A challenge. She looked him in the eyes. They were determined, full of life, and yearning to succeed. Her stomach gave a flip. _Has he always been that beautiful?_

That beef pastry he wanted was this ridiculously large fillet steak coated with mushrooms and pancake batter that was terribly easy to ruin or burn. Getting it right was laborious, and it took hours to prepare. 

But she was ready, and at this point she even felt like he didn’t even need to ask her. 

“Fine. Prove me wrong,” she said. “When you fail, though, you will do all my chores for two weeks.” 

“It’s a deal,” he said.

* * *

Terra’s triumphant return was not only met with praise from Master Eraqus, but it left a sense of ease within Aqua and Ventus, who were far less antsy with him around.

Sparring with him made her feel as though she was getting back on track, like she was training for her own improvement again. Terra was the complete opposite in fighting style. A warrior bent on using his sheer force to shatter his opponent. She was an acrobat, a mage determined to parry her opponent with mental accuracy and swift counterattacks. Sparring with him always sharpened her sense of evasion, because meeting some of his more broad brute swings directly was never an efficient idea.

After their duel was over, Aqua noticed the amount of sweat dampening his shirt, and the way his muscles moved as he breathed heavily. His hair was messy but it framed his jawline perfectly. His shoulders were broad, but had they always been? He had grown up so much and she knew this, so how was it she was just noticing this? What exactly changed?

The flutter in her stomach became unbearable and she could feel her cheeks getting hot, so she faced away from him and started her own exercises. Flips like a gymnast, with her hands and without, as she traversed from one end of the room to the other in a long line. The blood sent to her brain and the sensation of the air passing by her were enough to re-settle her senses.

At it worked well, until she saw that he watched her do it. Was that something he normally did, observe her practice? Such a strange and tense, yet gentle, stare. They locked eyes and he didn’t falter from the gaze, until he smiled gently and broke the connection.

Days went by and the two of them didn’t lock eyes like that again. 

It was much safer to watch him spar with Ventus, like she did on a new day like today, when the Master came in with a sense of urgency.

“Terra, I am sending you on another mission,” he said, holding up a card with some written information. “It is a rescue. You are to go to this world and assist these two fellows from an organization in saving a kidnapped six-year-old orphan girl. She has been missing for a month.”

Aqua gasped. “That’s so horrible.”

Terra couldn’t hide the feeling of anger in his voice. “What kind of people would do-”

“Terra,” the Master interrupted. “Remember what you and I spoke about. Your focus should be on the girl. This world is one devoid of magic, so you mustn’t rely too much on the Keyblade. You are also forbidden from harming the kidnapper.”

Terra took a hard swallow. “Understood, sir,” and bowed his head.

“The same rules from before apply, too. You are not to return here until you have completed your mission,” the Master said with a stern demeanor, though not with cruelty or scorn. 

Aqua stood up quickly, not really knowing what she was going to do. Object to the rules? Offer comfort? An orphan girl. So young, too. This would hit Terra really hard, since he was one also before the Master came to adopt him. 

Before she said anything, Terra faced his two friends with a forced smile and said, “well, I’m off. Don’t worry about me.” He left so quickly that she didn’t get a chance to say anything.

Aqua put her hand on Ventus’ shoulder, whose facial expression absolutely betrayed any sense of control over his emotions. 

“This one will be tricky,” he said quietly.

* * *

Each day that followed, Aqua tried to make it pass as normal. On the tenth night he was gone, she sat in the library, with that same book that she could barely finish, and a mug of tea that wasn’t brewed properly.

_I can bake very well, but I can’t make a decent cup of tea to save my life._

She tapped her fingers onto the table. _I need to know if he’s okay. Who is he with right now? Did he find her?_

_Is he even taking time to think about me?_

Flustered, Aqua marked her place in the book and shut it closed, retiring for the night. 

* * *

On the twelfth day since he left, Ventus offered the brilliant idea of visiting the waterfall nearby the castle. It was a place with a special memory: it was the first place they took him after he recovered from his sickness when he arrived. And it was Terra’s idea then. He begged her to go with him, his smile so wide it would have been infectious if she wasn’t in such a solemn mood.

But he didn’t allow her to reply to the idea. He just pulled her along with him. 

The waterfall was genuinely a picturesque scene. The water rolled over several sloped rock, all smooth from its constant work. There was a cliff that wasn’t too high, where she and Terra taught Ventus to jump off from. The water pooled into a decent sized lake, which further ran down a gentle stream. 

But this was the difficult part. No location in this entire world was a safe place where Aqua could be rid of Terra’s memory. Everything here she shared with him. It was probably something Ventus was aware of, too. Which meant that he probably also felt an ache somewhere due to the absence.

Aqua minded her own business sitting atop a boulder by the lake’s shore, Ventus entertaining himself by practicing strokes. She just wasn’t in the right mood to have fun - her mind was too focused on memories of them coming here as children, when they didn’t think about anything in the world that would make them sad. And she was so lost in thought that she didn’t notice - 

\- when he crept close to her underwater just to grab her by the leg and pull her down with him. 

This method worked to distract her. She surfaced with hysterical laughter, and the two splashed water on each other, though it quickly deteriorated into a competition. She won.

When they were done, they left the lakeside to dry themselves. 

“I miss him,” she said as she put her shoes back on. 

“I miss him, too.” Ventus was putting on his shirt. “I don’t really think this was an easy one for him.”

“I know he’ll be fine,” she said, looking off to the distance. “He’s brave, smart and resourceful. He’ll be able to make that girl feel safe. It just really hurts. It’s so strange not having him here.”

She chuckled out loud as she stood up. “It’s like I’m missing a half of me.”

“Oh. _I see_.”

Ventus contorted his face into a strange expression. His eyes narrowed, and his smile was wide but he gripped his lower lip with his teeth as it pulled upward toward his nose. Much like he discovered a very scandalous secret. 

“What’s that look for?” 

“He’s brave, and smart, and resourceful, _and strong, and tall, and handsome_.” He emulated a girl who is swooning with his hands, and his voice kicked up a pitch with each word that came out of his mouth.

Aqua replied nothing to this except to push him back into the water. Strong, tall, and handsome. It embarrassed her to even consider Terra any of these things, but they were true. 

* * *

Back at the castle, Aqua took stock of the food in the kitchen’s expansive cabinet space when Ventus bursted through the doors in order to make an announcement. 

“Aqua!” he called out in an almost whisper - a quiet announcement. “He’s back! He’s completely passed out in the library.” It was silly that he tried to lower his voice since the library was very far away from the kitchen and there was no way that anyone could hear him from there.

Not that she thought too hard about this. Aqua dumped the food she was counting and ran to the library, noticing that Ventus stayed behind. _Probably some nonsense about giving us space._ Still, for this she was grateful. 

And there, she saw him. Laid out on an ornate white and gold couch, on his side as he draped himself over a fluffy pillow, his face buried in it. A large, wrapped bandage was tightly knotted over his left arm. 

She gently walked over to him, and couldn’t help herself but graze over his hair with her hand. Gently, so she didn’t wake him. Her smile was so wide that her cheeks hurt. _I’m so glad you’re home._

A brown paper bag sat on the desk they normally shared for studying. _The Affairs of the Heart_ was stuffed with papers and photographs where she had last marked it. 

Opening it, she saw the first photograph. Terra smiling, in what looked to be a swamp, with bloodied rags tied around his left arm. He was with a blonde little girl in pigtails by his side, and two mice on his shoulders. She flipped the photo to see the scribble of a six-year-old’s handwriting. _My heros. Tera, Bernard, and Ms. Bianca._

The next photo, the girl had jumped up on Terra as she hugged him around his shoulders, her smile brimming wildly. Terra flashed a gorgeous, toothy grin as he hugged back. The kind of smile caught mid-laugh, and the only way he’d ever be caught on camera doing this.

Aqua’s stomach contorted into knots as she stared at the picture. _Oh, she’s so adorable. And him...  
_

A clip from a newspaper, with the headline, _GIRL KIDNAPPED FROM ORPHANAGE FOUND. The kidnappers, two pawn shop owners, were arrested and charged with child trafficking and attempted child homicide._

A letter from the same girl. _Dear Tera, thank you for sayving me and Mr. Tedy. I praid for you and you came. I want to now, am I good enuff to hav perents like you? Love, Penny._

A photograph of Penny and her teddy bear, with an adult man and woman, standing on a street covered in snow. Another letter from her. _Dear Tera, thank you for fynding me and Mr. Tedy perents! Now I hav a famili. I will tell them abaut you. You jumped on the alligaters and fell in the water. That meen man held a gun at you. You sayved me from drowning. Plees com visit me soon. I want to tell you abaut my cat. Give your frends the jinjersnaps. Love, Penny._

Aqua had tears running down her face, and she wiped them away. The gingersnaps must have been in the paper bag.

Another newspaper clipping. The headlines read, _Wonder Elephant Soars to Fame! Miracle Mammoth Startles World!_

A photo of Terra feeding a large elephant some peanuts, and calf with enormously large ears reaching for him with its trunk. She flipped the photo to its back to see Terra’s scratchy and uneven handwriting. _Dumbo and his mother._

The last photo. Dumbo in the sky, his ears stretched out as if they were wings. Clearly, she lost the bet. On the back, Terra’s handwriting again. _Dumbo. You owe me a steak pastry, exactly the way I like it cooked. P.S. Show Ven._

Aqua laughed in a whisper. He still slept soundly and peacefully on that couch, like he spent a lazy day instead of accomplishing any of these astounding things. Her heart pounded, and her chest swelled with a nervous excitement when she confirmed that yes, he really did seem different this time around.

* * *

Aqua set up all the necessary ingredients on the kitchen’s island to make Terra’s favorite dish as Ventus sat on the dining room table, struggling to finish what he called a stupid essay that did nothing for him. She saw him mumble to himself across the bar area, not turning a page for what seemed like an hour.

She heard footsteps, and when she peeked, she saw Terra approach them with a large hula hoop decorated with green and white stripes, and a fabric bag. 

“Whoa, what’s that?” Ventus jumped off the dining room table.

“Hello to you, too,” Terra said as he put the fabric bag down on the surface of the bar. 

He flipped the hula hoop in the air. “This is for you, Ven. Some of the dancers in the circus taught me how to play with it.”

A small pain twanged in Aqua’s chest at the thought of women flirting with Terra. It probably was fair. There was no denying he became good looking as he aged. That wasn’t exactly what bothered her.

Terra demonstrated some movements with the hoop as he twirled and sweeped with it. And Ventus was so ridiculously excited that it there weren’t words to describe it. Taking the hoop, he tried to imitate the movements, and smacked himself on the face. Next, he tried jumping with the hoop. He threw it into the air and caught it. 

“It could be good practice for _something_. He has way too much energy,” Terra said in a low voice as he sat at the bar.

“You’re hurt?” She gestured over to his bandage.

He waved her concerns away. “Just a flesh wound.” He grabbed the bag and put it in front of him.

“This is for you.” He gave a small smile as he crossed his arms and leaned on the surface of the bar.

“It better be as hypnotizing as that hoop,” she said. She had no expectations when she unraveled it. Probably something that he grabbed on his way back.

But it wasn’t as simple as that. It was a group of things that he would have had to travel far away to find, for the sole purpose of hunting them down for her. A tin can of bright yellow turmeric. A bag full of spicy red annatto. A wooden box of forest green hyssopus. 

All proof that he didn’t just put in all this effort into a difficult search for them, but that he was thinking of her as well. She got light-headed at the thought, and her heart beat fast.

There he was leaning on his hand, with this excitable smile on his face. He was anxious to see her reaction. As if he had been looking forward to giving this to her for ages.

Aqua slowed down a shaky laugh to seem in control of her emotions. Her smiled widened. “Terra, you’re amazing.”

There was a twinkle in his eye, as though he wasn’t expecting such a response. He tried to keep a smile, but he was obviously nervous. “Do you really mean that?” he said in a low voice. 

Did she really mean it? Yes, Terra was amazing. In the things that he was able to achieve. But in a different way, too. Amazing in all the qualities that he showed to others, to her. Amazing in such a way that she realized it made her wish he would look at her like that every single day. 

She glanced over at Ventus. He let the hoop drag on his back while he watched them. He rolled his eyes dramatically, and she was sure she’d hear his taunts later that night.

“Terra, you are back,” the Master’s voice interrupted her thoughts.

Aqua took this opportunity to turn away to focus on the ingredients in front of her, grateful for the opportunity to calm down. 

“Terra, you did wonderfully,” she could hear the Master say behind her. “I’m so proud of you.” 

She smiled to herself, knowing full well that these kinds of words will make Terra’s spirit soar with pride and a newfound confidence for the rest of the day. A sense that he could achieve what he wanted. He deserved it. 

And she, too, wished he kept watching her as she worked, knowing that he instead kept himself busy as he exchanged words with the Master over his journey. Ventus scurried over and exclaimed that he, too, wanted to hear about these wild adventures. 

Aqua listened on as she lovingly spiced the raw meat, with the intent of making it absolutely perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter references Dumbo (1941) and The Rescuers (1977).


	2. Volume II: A Tale of Lessons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eleven-year-old Terra finds that he keeps messing up even with the smallest of actions. He tries his hardest to learn his lessons as he attempts to make Aqua feel better from her threatening illness.
> 
> Rating: K+

The hike up the mountain was arduous. Terra had somehow convinced Aqua to follow him all the way to the peak of the massive spiral that stood a couple of miles away from the academy, under the belief that it probably had the best view of the entire area. That it was best for their training to climb it.

For an eleven-year-old boy, Terra certainly had spirit. “The Master always said that hiking was good to build strong ankles,” he said as he hopped up the rocky trail.

The two children were blocked from continuing further due to a rather short cliff side that stood in the way on their trail. It was probably seven feet tall at most, but they were so close to the peak at this point.

“This will be easy to climb. Like a tree. No problem,” Terra began to position himself to start climbing. For a kid who has been playing on these mountains since he was six, this wasn’t much of a hassle.

“Easy for _you_ to say,” Aqua muttered under her breath, but loud enough for him to hear. The ten-year-old had only arrived at the academy two years earlier, her long hair tied in a ponytail and graced in a white bow.

The climb was a little trickier than Terra had initially expected. There were one too many times where Terra had to stay in one position to search for another crevice to use as a grip, and this was tiring. However, Terra had a distinct advantage, considering that he had been growing so tall so fast.

“Terra, you _promised_ this will be a good view!” he could hear from below him. She sounded very annoyed.

“We’re _almost_ there! We can’t give up now!”

And right he was. When they reached the summit, the academy stood far below in the distance. Beyond, they could see silhouettes of mountains that were not visible to them down by the academy, snowcapped and beautiful in their presence. Against the sky, this was a sight to behold. Birds were flying far below them. The sky was overcast, and this gave the entire view a misty look. The wind was blowing hard, and it was sharp and cold.

“Wow, I wonder what it’s like to fly from here.” Terra couldn’t keep his eyes away from the horizon of mountains.

Aqua was spitting hair from out of her mouth and tried to keep it off her face. “Let’s not do _that_.”

“Hey, did I ever tell you about the demon that sat on top of a mountain?”

“What are you talking about?”

“I tried reading it from a book that the Master had when I was little. It was evil and it sat on a giant mountain like this one.” He waved his arms to gesture the grandeur. “And it would summon ghosts and stuff.”

“So what happened to it?”

“I don’t know. Master got mad at me for reading it and took it away.”

“What’s the _point_ of telling me a story with no ending?” Her hands were on her hips, and her hair blew all over her face.

“Sor-ry, Miss Smarty-Pants.”

In the distance, the clouds were getting thicker and darker. A troubling sign when alone on such treacherous and unpredictable terrain.

Terra’s stomach dropped a little bit and his throat clenched, unable to hide the nervousness in his voice. “Maybe it’s time we should head back. We shouldn’t get stuck out here in the rain. If it thunders, that’s really bad.”

The wind blew harder as they made it down the trail they had just finished climbing up. The cold now sheared through their clothes. They both wore light jackets, but it wasn’t enough to keep them warm.

At the cliff side, Terra tried to climb down as fast as possible but he slipped, and fell on his back. Aqua was stuck near the top, not knowing how to get down fast enough.

Sore but alright, Terra brushed dirt off his himself, feeling droplets of water slowly hit his face. “Aqua, just jump, I’ll catch you!”

“I can make it eventually!”

“We don’t have time for that!”

Aqua moaned as though she was trying to protest, but let herself fall. The landing sent Terra reeling backwards as his back took another blow.

He quickly got up, grunting, and clasped her hand. “C’mon, we really have to go.”

The two friends, hand in hand, ran down the rocky terrain as fast as they could without tripping. The rain started to fall in full, soaking the children in what felt like a freezing punishment. Terra slipped in the mud, dragging Aqua down with him. He was way too sore for this.

Aqua helped him up, and they continued to run down the muddy and rocky trail. Visibility was getting low as the rain came down harder. Thunder struck loudly.

_Oh no._

“C’mon, we need shelter.” He immediately took Aqua to an area covered by a ledge that jutted far out. It didn’t protect them from the muddy water flowing down the mountainside, which continued to soak them. But this was better and far safer than being out in the open air.

Thunder crashed again so loudly that Aqua screamed a little. They were holding each other, shivering as they waited out the storm. Terra tried to cover her with part of his jacket, although it was soaked. The rain beat down so loudly that it was hard to speak to each other.

Aqua used healing magic on him. “For your back,” she said softly, but she was close enough that Terra could hear her. Still shivering, she conjured a fireball to burn continuously in her hands in order to keep them warm.

For what seemed like forever, the rain continued to beat down, even after the thunder wore off. Terra contemplated making a run back home again. _Or is that going to hurt her? Master always said I was the oldest, and I should look out for her._

They were shivering so much that it began to get painful. But a voice calling their names was heard, competing with the loudness of the watery onslaught. Master Eraqus, covered in a tarp but just as soaked as they were, looked under the ledge where the two children were huddled together.

“I can’t believe the two of you made it all the way out here. Look at you, soaked to the bone,” he said as he gave them tarps of their own. Terra wasn’t certain if the Master was too worried to be angry, but he didn’t look forward to getting home.

  

* * *

 

The next morning, Terra arrived to the dining room by himself. The night before, the Master drew them both hot baths, and the children threw themselves in with their clothes on. Eraqus was stern and strict with his orders as he told them to get warm and to get into dry clothes, although he served no punishment... yet. Maybe it was because he was too relieved that they were alright.

Still, it was weird that Terra woke up first. The Master entered the kitchen and began preparing a stew.

“Master, where’s Aqua?”

“She’s very sick, Terra. She can’t get out of bed.”

A hard lump formed in Terra’s throat. _What does it mean that she’s sick? Is this my fault because I took her up that stupid mountain?_

“Is she... “ Terra’s voice was soft and nervous.

“Terra.” The Master sounded as though he was going to give Terra a scolding, but contained himself as if to spare the boy. “Where did you get the idea that doing this was going to be beneficial to you?”

“I... I just wanted to show her something cool.”

“Terra, you _really_ need to learn to think things through.”

“I- I’m sorry. Is she going to die?” Terra’s voice was shaky. _She’s my only friend._

“Terra.” The Master sounded stern. “She’s not going to die. I do not think I will punish you for this, but you will need to make up for it. I think you understand your guilt, and you will probably feel worse when you see her.”

Terra had nothing to say to this.

“Do you want to do something to make her feel better?” The Master took out a tea kettle.

“Yes, sir.”

“Then come. I will show you how to make the best teas for any kind of sickness.”

 

* * *

 

The cough coming out of Aqua was hoarse, deep, phlegmy, and loud.

Eraqus touched her forehead. “What an awful fever,” he said quietly.

Terra slowly approached the side of the bed, the cup of steaming ginger tea in his hands. Aqua’s cheeks were flushed, and her hair damp as if she had been sweating. She opened her large eyes, and Terra could barely refrain from crying out loud.

“Here, we made you this,” was what he said instead.

Aqua sat up weakly, and took the cup in her hands. When she drank it, her eyebrows went up and she looked taken aback.

“You didn’t like it?” Terra was afraid that he messed it up.

“No, I like it. It’s just strong.” Her voice was weak as well.

“Well then, it looks like it’s going to be a long recovery for you,” the Master said. “Terra has been tasked with making you tea every day.”

“I’ll do better next time,” Terra smiled meekly as Aqua coughed. He didn’t think she would accept an apology if he gave it.

 

* * *

 

Days without Aqua were boring. Terra had been assigned by the Master to read several books on medicinal herbs to serve as his commitment to redeem himself after putting her in a dangerous position, but he was still allowed to play whenever he wanted.

But it was of no use to play without a playmate. Eraqus normally played with Terra when he was much younger, far before she came around. Now, when she wasn’t there, Terra was left to his own imagination, which didn’t talk back.

Terra sparred by himself by practicing his posture and movements, but there was no one there to cheer him on when he was doing well, or to help him improve. Or to argue with him when he messed up and he didn’t want to hear it, in the snarky way that she would do because she needed to act like she knew everything. Or to tease him when he tripped.

Their favorite past time was always to sit in the field close by the academy and stare at the stars, talking about anything they wanted to. But she wasn’t here for that, either.

Terra noticed each night he brought her the third cup of tea for the day that she would stare out her window at the stars from her bed. He would sit next to her and they talked over what he did that day.

It was time now to do something different. Something to make up for getting her sick. Terra took a cardboard box and carved images into it. When he brought her tea that night, he replaced her lampshade with his cardboard box, and it formed lighted shapes all over her room.

“Stars!” She laid back into her bed, taking her time to see each shape he made for her.

“Some of them are.” Terra laid down on the floor next to her. “Can you tell what the other ones are?”

“There’s a sun,” she pointed, her nose still stuffy. “And I can see a moon there. That looks like a bird.” She paused for a moment and then pointed to one that was close to the corner of her room. “What is _that_ supposed to be?”

“A lizard.”

“It looks like a blob.”

“ _You_ try carving a lizard if you think you’re _so_ good at it.”

Aqua laughed as she turned to her side to see him from above. “I like it anyway. Can I keep it?”

Terra blushed at the thought, but luckily it was too dark in the room for her to notice. “Sure. Whatever.”

“Hey Terra, what about that story you told me about?”

“I told you. I couldn’t finish it.”

“You don’t think that book will be in the library?”

 _Well, it could_. “Hm, I want to find out what happened, too. I’ll find it,” he said, with all the confidence of someone who knew exactly what he was doing.

 

* * *

 

In daylight, the library looked massive and tall, with gold accents spread all over the white walls. The windows were just as tall as the library itself. Terra took continuous laps around, trying to eye the book in any of the shelves. He finally caught a glimpse. There was no way that he could forget the look of it. The only black book on the shelf, thick and adorned with vine-like designs on the spine.

However, it was way up somewhere where he could never reach by himself. Still, there was a ladder. The tall ladder was rickety and thin, like a frail ancient thing, and it shook when he climbed on it. When he stood on top of it, he reached for the book, but he still wasn’t tall enough to get to it. The ladder shook heavily as he tried to get on his toes, and he grabbed the shelf to stabilize himself.

He remembered the Master’s words. How he _really_ needed to learn to think things through. _If I fall and hurt myself, the Master will surely be upset with me. Aqua usually is there to heal me so I won’t get in trouble, but she’s forbidden to use magic now that she’s sick._

He carefully climbed back down, and thought about this plans. _I don’t want the Master’s help. I really want her to know that I was the one who grabbed the book._

He looked around the library. _I need to make this place safe for me to fall._

The shelf stood close to a long table and chairs, where they would normally read books together. _If I fall on that, I will definitely break bones. That has to go._

He pushed the long table up to be parallel against the wall opposite the shelf, and stacked the chairs on top of it. It left an open space of bare floor. _I can’t fall directly on this. I need pillows.  
_

There were several couches and lounge chairs around the library. From them, he brought back eight pillows, and placed them neatly around the ladder. It looked bare of protection, however.

He went to the foyer on the ground floor, where a couple of more lounge chairs stood, each with an adorned pillow. But still not enough. _What if I fall too far from the ladder? There aren’t enough pillows._

He traversed throughout the entire second floor, where several smaller libraries, the kitchen, and guest rooms were located. The long hallways had a few couches spread throughout. And he took pillows from every single one. From this floor alone, it took him three trips.

But still, it wasn’t enough. _What if these pillows move around when I fall on them and I hit the floor? I need enough to stack all of them, so that I have enough padding.  
_

So through every floor, he explored. Seven of them total. The uppermost floor was mostly storage, and many of the antiques and old furniture were covered by a bedsheet to keep dust off of them. Terra removed these sheets to see if he can find old sofas and lounge chairs. He opened chests to see if anything inside was useful to him. In the end, he poured all the pillows he could find into a bedsheet, and used it to carry his spoils. Then he thought it would be a good idea to have these bedsheets as a final layer to keep all the pillows together, and went back up to get them all.

After he finished, he had enough pillows and bedsheets to makeshift tall beds for at least ten older children. _There’s no way I can get hurt now._

He climbed to the top of the shaky ladder, and got on his toes to reach for the book. He leaned on the shelf to give himself stability. The book was barely out of his grasp, so he focused on stretching himself to his maximum ability as the ladder shook harder under him. He grabbed the book, and with all his force, pulled it out. He fell backward off the ladder.

He landed on the pillows - a soft, but dusty, landing. There were so many, in fact, that when the ladder fell, it didn’t make any loud noises.

“I did it!” he exclaimed, as he read the title of the heavy trophy that he finally won. _Tales of Darkness_ , it read, the ornate decoration of a woman’s face with snakes for hair on the cover. It was definitely the right book.

He scuffled off the pillows, tripped over them, and ran off from the library to show her the book.

 

* * *

 

The book was full of many different tales of monsters, demons, and vague stories of dark powers. It even had drawings of what these demons looked like.

“What a scary book,” Aqua said, her loose hair covering her shoulders. She stood up and sniffled as Terra showed her the contents, the sun shining through her window. “Are you sure we should be looking through this?”

“Well...” Terra continued to flip through the pages, eager to find the demon that captured his imagination years before. “I was seven when I first read it. I think I’m old enough now.”

And there it was. A drawing of a humongous man with glowing yellow eyes,  horns and bat wings. He was so large that he seemed to be part of the mountain. _What a complicated name, though._

“Cher-na-bog?” Terra read.

“Let me see,” Aqua pulled the book around so she can take a look. “He looks exactly as you described him. So, tell me the story!”

Terra took a moment to read a little bit. “He is a demon that sleeps on a mountain, and every 100 years he comes out to haunt the villagers in the valley by summoning ghosts and small demons to hurt them. They suffer an endless night until they can get rid of him.”

“Yeesh. How do you stop him?”

Terra read some more, and footsteps were heard behind him. He turned on his chair to see the Master standing in the doorway to Aqua’s room.

“Terra,” the Master said, with the apparent tone that he considered Terra at fault for something. “Can you explain to me the mess in the library?”

“I got a book for Aqua.” It should have been obvious to the Master that this was the case.

“ _What book_ is worth all that trouble?” Eraqus touched his own forehead, as though he couldn’t comprehend what got Terra into this. When he saw the book, he let out a loud sigh. “What are you doing with this?”

“I wanted to find out about...” Terra held the book close to his face. “Cher-na-bog. But I don’t understand what it’s saying about how to stop him.”

Aqua leaned forward and scrunched her bedsheets in her hands. “Please, Master, tell us how he was defeated.”

“Yeah, please, Master. I don’t know what it means when it says that he was turned away by the sound of bells and the light of... _ann-gulls_?” Terra said.

“It’s _angels_ ,” Eraqus said.

“What’s an angel?”

“Some worlds believe that light can be personified as figures of guidance and protection. So this demon was banished because these beings came down to stop him.”

“But what does that _mean_?”

The Master gently took the book out of Terra’s hands. “Terra, there isn’t even proof that such a creature exists, anyway. It’s all old fables. But what _does_ exist is that mess you left behind. And a proper Keyblade wielder knows how to tidy up his affairs.”

Terra crossed his arms and scowled.

“Terra, I promise you will get the answers you want when you are older. Think of yourself as a future angel when you become a Keyblade wielder. Do you think an angel, therefore, will be messy?”

The Master left with the book, and Terra took his time to stretch when he stood up, prolonging the time before he had to do his chores for a long as possible. Aqua laughed behind him.

“I wonder what it was you did,” she said as she tucked her knees to her chest. “Thanks for taking care of me, Terra.”

Terra blushed and made sure she didn’t see it. “Yeah, well, okay. You’re welcome. Whatever.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter references Fantasia (1940).


	3. Volume III: A Tale of Landslides, Pt. 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Mark of Mastery is almost here. Nineteen-year-old Terra and eighteen-year-old Aqua have one last mission to complete before they they are evaluated for all the efforts they put into being Keyblade Masters. If only they had mastery over their own emotions.
> 
> Rating: T for sexual references.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> holyteapotofrussell from Tumblr sent me this prompt:
> 
> “It’s three in the morning.” This ended up very, very long so I will divide it into parts and will address the prompt in the next part.
> 
> I wanted to dedicate this beast, which took weeks to write, to my readers. It has been a very dark month. You guys are the only reason why this was finished, and the only reason why I continue writing. Thank you guys so much!!! You being there gives me so much meaning that no words can define. It’s the lifeline I rely on. <3
> 
> Title of the chapter is named after Fleetwood Mac’s “Landslide.”

Terra twirled the card detailing the goals of his next mission in his hand. He would share this mission with Aqua, who was currently busy drilling her dance movements. He learned to respect her time to that kind of dedication, since it was such an important aspect to her fighting style. It was also a craft that wasn’t shared with either him nor their Master.

This annoyed him a little though, not that he would ever ask her to stop dancing. He normally loved watching her, admiring her ability to adapt such beauty and grace to the way she commanded her magic. It proved fruitful, since he had been stumbling more often in their last several duels. And if he was going to be honest, watching her dance was also the one chance he got away with gazing at her.

But the Mark of Mastery was less than two weeks away. Eraqus had already informed them that an old friend of his, another Master, would be on his way to examine them. Another pair of eyes from a stranger, there to judge their performance. Terra needed the both of them to do well, including this mission. They’ve worked too hard for too long to make a bad impression on someone else who wouldn’t know a thing about them.

_I’m sure Aqua is also nervous. Why else would she be dancing before we have to embark?_

He entered the lounge of the castle, a spacious room featuring several desks and loveseats, a small library, a wardrobe, and massive windows to a view of the mountains. _We really need more students. This castle is far too big for us._

Ventus sat there alone with an open book, looking like he was working on an essay. Except he wasn’t. He was doodling what was a mess of himself fighting monsters. Terra pulled on the backrest of the boy’s chair so that the blonde can look directly up at him.

“That looks like a fantastic essay you’ve got written there,” Terra said to the young boy who was showing off a grin, happy to see his oldest best friend.

But the grin quickly faded. “This book sucks,” was all Ventus had to say.

Terra let go of the chair and leaned over to read the cover of the book. _Guidelines from the Philosophies of the Greats: On the Adjustment of a Keyblade Bearer’s Lifestyle_. It was the driest book he and Aqua had ever studied, and it was mandatory. He didn’t understand why Eraqus still required it.

Terra didn’t grimace at the sight however, knowing that any sign of discouragement was going to make it so much harder for Ventus to start his essay - a feat that the boy already struggled with. This led to too many long nights before the deadline rushing to finish it. Terra usually was the one to help him, as Aqua quickly ran out of patience.

“You know, when you finish this book, it will do wonders for your sparring. It will completely change the way you approach fighting,” Terra said. It was a lie. There was nothing in this book about fighting.

Ventus at first looked suspicious, then softened his expression as timid excitement seeped through. “Really?”

“Of course. It’s the most important book that a Keyblader wielder needs.” Terra tried hard to keep a straight face.

Ventus put his doodles aside, a little curious to find out how the book would cater to his interests. It was then that Terra noticed another book underneath the messy stack of papers and pencils. It was battered and well-worn, displaying the image of a fox and a bear donning a bow and arrow. _The Adventures of Robin Hood_. This book belonged in the library normally, but Terra knew that if he were to open it, the very first page would grace the scratchy hand-written words of a ten-year old: _this book belongs to Terra_.

“What is this doing here?” Terra asked, a little smile curled on his lips as his heart pumped with childish excitement.

“Isn’t it the _coolest_ book ever? It’s so much better than this crap.”

“Well, there’s nothing that could be better because Robin Hood is the greatest hero of all time. But it’s no excuse to not do your studies.” Terra flipped through the pages. He read this so many times that he could almost memorize the entire thing. Images of his childhood imagination threatened to take his mind away. “I actually wanted to be exactly like him.”

“You know he reminds me of you.”

Terra flashed a look of disbelief at first, not certain if it was a genuine compliment or a jab. But he wouldn’t be able to figure it out. Aqua rushed into the lounge, panting a little bit, and looking a bit more serious than what was usual after a drilling session. Dance normally perked her up.

“I’m ready,” she said as she approached Terra. She gave a small smile, but the tone of her voice seemed to force optimism.

_Yup, she’s stressed._

Ventus swung around his chair. “I hate the _both_ of you right now for leaving me here alone.”

“We don’t have a choice, Ven,” Aqua said as she gently brushed his hair. “You can always have the Master help you out.”

Ventus rolled his eyes. “All he’s going to do is criticize the way I do things. Terra is much more fun doing the most boring things with.”

Terra snorted. “I hope that’s not _all_ I’m good for.”

“And it _sucks_ that I can’t do anything.”

Aqua let out a deep breath through her nose, her jaw a little tense. She normally was soothing and understanding of how isolated Ventus felt in the castle, but it seemed as though she was itching to get this mission over with. 

”C’mon Ven,” Terra said, “what do we make you repeat every time one of us goes away on a mission?”

Ventus let out an incredibly loud and snarky sigh as if to protest. “When you guys were _my_ age,” he started with clear mockery and contempt while maintaining a monotone delivery, “you weren’t allowed to go out _either_.”

Terra gestured to Ventus to continue the speech.

Ventus glared at him. “And _one_ day, even though _it will never happen_ because the Master is _absolutely_ _paranoid_ , I will be able to leave the grounds - let me _mention_ that the Master took _you_ _guys_ out when you were young and never does for _me_.”

“That’s good enough.” Terra smirked. There was nothing he could do to ease Ventus’ restlessness and feelings of abandonment except to keep the atmosphere uplifting. Aqua smiled sadly.

“Where are you guys going this time?” Ventus asked, seemingly unaware of her mood.

Terra held up the card with the details. “We need to guide a princess of a kingdom into following her destiny. Apparently, the Master felt the forces of fate stirring for her, and he doesn’t want her following a dark path. That’s where we come in.”

“And we can’t mess up,” Aqua said with a forced smile. They normally had a philosophy of keeping positive about their prospects, although it seemed that her slightly perfectionist tendencies were getting in the way this time.

_Well, we can’t always have a great outlook. I’m going to have to be the one to let her relax this time._

“We won’t,” Terra said as he gently squeezed her shoulder.

 

* * *

 

The two Keyblade wielders stood in the throne room, guards surrounding them. They were being questioned by the king and queen while their daughter, Merida, pleaded with them to listen to her. She tried to tell them that they had saved her from her horse reacting to a round of boars - hiding the fact that she was there to hunt them in the first place.

The queen in particular was much more concerned about the way Terra and Aqua looked and dressed. She focused on Aqua’s choice of hairstyle and how she refused to dress like a woman. She focused on Terra’s tan skin, and wondered where he had come from. Clearly, they were outsiders, and the queen feared an invasion. The king, however, burst into a fit of hysteria and dismissed his wife. He pointed to Terra and exclaimed that there was no way they could pose a threat since _this pretty boy has eyelashes like a cow’s!_

Merida used her father’s reaction to convince her mother that neither of them posed a threat and that they were her friends. _So, please Mum, let them stay.  
_

The queen was convinced to agree. The king pulled Terra aside while Merida  grabbed Aqua by the hands and led her away. The princess took quite a liking to her the moment they met. Aqua lingered back at him as she disappeared through a doorway.

The king listed the things he expected Terra to do as they walked through the stone castle halls. Hunting. Upkeeping the farms. Guarding the castle. He slipped in his long speech that Terra could not continue to dress the way he did. He took time to tell Terra of a tale where he faced a large, monstrous bear and how proud he was of his accomplishments - even though he failed to capture or kill the bear. He then addressed Terra as “the foreigner” to his men.

Terra was shown to his quarters, a large room filled with bunkers that he would share with the other servicemen in the castle. He was given what they called a kilt, and was dragged outside to start his chores. The other men flipped between calling him “pretty boy” and “foreigner” for nicknames. The latter made Terra’s skin crawl, though he tried not to let it terrify him. He focused on making himself seem as less threatening as possible. _The last thing I need right now is to be thrown into the dungeon because they suspect I’m a spy or something._

When he sparred, he messed up on purpose in order to make it seem like he didn’t know what he was doing - despite that none of the other men posed a challenge to him. _Nonviolent. As long as they understand me as nonviolent._

This invited more teases and laughs from the other men however, who then considered Terra as someone who wanted very hard to look like a man but could never be one. Terra bit his tongue each time they referred to him as a “lady,” and instead thought about ways to reunite with Aqua. He wasn’t allowed up in the princess’ ward of the castle, so he couldn’t just walk up to her.

Not that these restrictions in behavior were important to Aqua, or to Merida for that matter. He saw them together in the field while he was herding sheep. They were practicing archery together and riding horses. Aqua was wearing a long brown gown made of cotton, indicative of maid work. She looked pretty. But she was pretty anyway in whatever she wore, even after grueling training sessions that left her sweating. She beamed a smile as she rode a horse for the first time in her life, radiant as her short hair bounced. A stress-free smile.

Terra forgot he had sheep to take care of. The men made sure to remind him of that as they guffawed about his _pretty little head up in some maid-in-waiting’s bosom where it don’t belong._ One of the sheep bayed as if she was in agreement.

Aqua noticed him from the distance and while on her horse, gestured with her head toward the forest behind the castle. It was to say that they should meet later that day. Terra knew what was expected of him and how it should happen. He tended to his sheep with as much determination and focus as possible to keep the other men off his back. Knowing he will reunite with her was comforting enough to keep him going on his meaningless chores.

With every single one of his sheep accounted for, Terra took the opportunity to sneak away when the other men gathered together for a late afternoon brew. He slid through the shadows in between the trees, making sure that he couldn’t be seen from where he stood. He gazed upon the castle, sitting in a valley amidst serene mountains that were threatened by storm clouds far away. Lakes rested in between, undisturbed by wind or any other force of nature. Taller mountains were standing peacefully with snow caps. It was a beautiful sight, very much like home.

He placed his thumb and middle finger up against his tongue as he rolled it. He whistled three short times. Silence. A half hour later, after a short walk in the forest where he found a clearing with a creek, he whistled three short times again. Two long ones replied. This was the signal. Anytime they were separated in the mountains as children, this was their call to find each other.

Aqua approached him, her brown dress dragging the leaves on the ground and her short, choppy hair perfectly framing her face. Terra must have stared for a little too long because she suddenly got self-conscious.

“It’s called a dress, Terra. Sheesh.”

He forced a chuckle out of nervousness. “As long as you’re comfortable.”

She put her hands to her hips. “What about what you’re wearing?”

“A kilt.” He nodded as he wrinkled his chin and swayed his hips back and forth. “It’s nice and airy. But... well...”

Something on his face must have given his anxious disposition away, because Aqua immediately gave him a knowing smile that told him she was ready to tease. “What is it?” She was grinning, not a single ounce of stress on her face.

“Well...” His voice wavered. “ _Some_ of the men, you know, kind of... don’t... _wear_ anything underneath.”

She snorted very loudly and eased herself into laughter, the sound of which made his heart jump. She was most beautiful laughing, and he had to control the aching need to touch her.

He continued, “I’ve had my fair share of sights today as it is.”

“No!” Her hand was on her chest and her eyes were tearing from the laughter. “Tell me you’re-”

“Of course I’m wearing shorts under it, Aqua,” he stressed, his nose wrinkling as she laughed harder. “What is hard to deal with though is how the guys here just have these very _specific_ expectations of how I am supposed to act - like I’m not worth their respect otherwise.”

“Tell me about it, it’s _suffocating_. I swear, I think the queen mentioned the length of my hair _three_ times.” She composed herself and wiped her tears. “Merida really struggles under this kind of pressure, which is a shame because she has such spirit and she’s a great fighter. I’m grateful the Master doesn’t force such insignificant and stupid rules on us, it’s ridiculous. I wish I could take her with us.”

“I would like to do the same for her...” Terra started to say and then fell silent. He didn’t need to finish the sentence. They both knew that they could not mess with the political affairs of other worlds. Merida was just unlucky and he was no Robin Hood.

Merida however was lucky enough to have Aqua as a friend. She told him that she served mainly as a personal counselor for the princess: sparring with her, learning about archery, and meeting her trivial needs. Aqua gained the princess’ trust fairly easily.

“Anyway, I asked you to come here for a reason.” Aqua proceeded to take her brown dress off and toss it to the side, revealing a shorter but simple white cotton underdress with no sleeves. White was the best color on her. She summoned her Keyblade and got serious, her upright posture ready to duel. “We can’t slack off.“

Terra summoned his own, grateful for the chance to practice so shortly before their exam. “Who said we would?”

Aqua, having trained with him since she was eight years old, utilized her acrobatic abilities to outmaneuver him. It was best for her not to directly encounter him head-on since he was a powerhouse. It proved more useful to just strike him whenever he left himself open, which happened more often than Terra would like to admit, since his attacks can get slow and wide as he mustered every ounce of strength into each blow. He could easily brutalize her if he caught her unguarded, but over time she barely allowed it. Of course, there was also her magic that he had to juggle as well. He bore magic too, but it never shone a light in comparison to her skill.

Because of this, Terra had stumbled several times, as what had become usual in the last few weeks. Normally, he would have no trouble keeping up with her or making up for his mistakes. _She has improved so much in the last couple of years and I’m now falling behind. I’m sure the Master has noticed my lack of performance. Am I not going to be able to pass the exam?_

When their duel was over, Aqua headed over to the creek to rinse the sweat from her arms, neck, and face. He silently squatted next to her and did the same. It wasn’t just the Master that he worried about. For as much as he admired Aqua, he wanted her to reciprocate. He wanted her to continue to see him as an equal. _What if she doesn’t think that I am good enough for her anymore? What if I drag her down?_

“How did I do?” she asked. It was always the question that followed after a duel. Checking on their progress. This was the way the two of them held each other accountable for their work.

“You were incredibly difficult to pin down. You’ve been working hard, I can tell,” he said.

She sighed, sounding as if she was relieved. It made sense. Progress was always a good sign. Terra didn’t bother asking about his own performance, however. He wasn’t sure he wanted to hear what she had to say.

She noticed that he didn’t ask and went ahead with her thoughts anyway. “I was pulling new moves on you. You’ll eventually get the pattern down in no time and start beating me. Definitely by the exam. I mean, you know me. You know you’ve done this longer and that you’re an amazing fighter. You’ll see that I’ll get predictable again.” She leaned forward in order to meet his gaze, to make sure he got the message.

All of those words made sense. They were far softer than anything the Master would have told him. But it brought little comfort. The point was to only hear words of praise out of her mouth. Terra nodded in return, thinking about how time had changed his perspective completely. Before, he had no trouble hearing what she had to say. They were on this road to becoming Keyblade Masters together. Only together should they succeed, and only together could they improve.

But as he got older, as he noticed different features on her, as he started to feel new sensations in his body and the pangs of loneliness that came after, he yearned for her praise. He needed any ounce of proof that he could win her affections, that he could be something more than just her equal. It had been a few years since she was more to him after all. As time passed, it was less comfortable for him to hear her criticisms. He had to do better. He had to _be_ better.

She smacked him on the shoulder, a gracious smile on her face. “Hey, I’m not talking to myself for my health.”

“Sorry.” He forced a grin. “There’s a lot to think about.”

“Yeah.” She nodded as she pursed her lips, the weight of the exam heavy in the air around them. But her eyes were bright and large and stunning anyway, and they locked with his. A pause between them. She chuckled and stood up, breaking the connection and it pained him a bit. She pulled her brown dress on and dusted off the dirt.

“I can’t imagine the queen’s fright if she saw me walking around in what is technically my underwear,” she said. “I’m relieved that we fought. I needed to get away from all of those pointless rules.”

It seemed as though she was trying to make him laugh, although he didn’t give her what she wanted. She cleared her throat and gestured her head behind her. “C’mon, Terra. There is this secret passage that I want to show you back at the castle.”

“Secret passage?”

“I asked Merida about it and she just showed it to me. It goes straight to her side of the castle.” She stepped toward him.

“So we’ll be sneaking around. The guys will never let it down if they ever find out.”

“Then don’t let them.”

Another lingering look. Another nervous chuckle, Aqua and Terra together wondering about the implication of what sneaking around was supposed to mean.

 

* * *

 

Two nights after that duel, Terra sat with his best friend inside a room tucked away within the secret passage of the castle. It was the safest place for them to converse without any interruptions, expectations, or demands. They were sitting atop some dusty crates that the tens of people living within the castle had all forgotten about, eating lamb meat. Though Aqua made a passing comment that it had no flavor.

“You know,” Aqua said, “the queen talked today about preparing Merida for a possible suitor for marriage. Three princes from other clans will arrive tomorrow.” She sounded a bit apprehensive.

“I can’t imagine that she would want that,” Terra said.

“Maybe this is what the Master meant by fates changing for her? What am I supposed to do, though, Terra? Am I supposed to comfort her and make her feel at peace with the ceremony?”

“It’s funny, I don’t actually think it’s the right thing to do.” Terra imagined what Robin Hood would do. _To the depths of the deepest cracks of the earth with the idea of a forced marriage!_ But if only he was working in an actual fairy tale. He swallowed his flavorless meat, though he didn’t mind it. “But still... you can’t tell her _not_ to see it through. You can’t actually affect how another world maintains its balance.”

“I know, but I’d hate to agree with the queen on this one.”

“Maybe you don’t have to.” Terra stopped eating. “So far, all we have done is observe. There is no darkness here. Maybe we should let it happen and see what Merida does.”

Aqua nodded unenthusiastically. Terra noticed for the first time that she had stopped eating a while ago. “What’s on your mind?” he asked.

Aqua smiled, though it wasn’t her usual calm, collected grin. She was worried again. “I was thinking about the Keyblade Master coming. You know, Master Xehanort? Remember him?”

“Yeah,” he shrugged. “He didn’t spend a lot of time with us, though. He dropped Ventus off, and spoke with the Master for the most part. He _was_ a bit eccentric. He actually tuned that old piano in the ballroom, played for a bit, and then left rather abruptly when Ventus wouldn’t wake up. I remember him expressing a desire to have dinner with us. He was very nice otherwise.”

“I remember him being very knowledgeable when he was talking with the Master.”

“You nervous?”

“Well, if you ask _me_ , he could never have a good reason to fail either of us. But that’s just the one day he will see us. He won’t get to see all the years we put into this.”

“There’s absolutely _no_ way you can fail, Aqua.”

She sighed through her nose. “There’s no way _you_ can fail, either. But even if we pass-”

“When.”

“Okay, _when_ we pass...” Aqua looked a bit overwhelmed. “We have been training our whole lives for this. Aside from the house I left when I lost my family, I know nothing else except training for this one special day. We have been dreaming for this for so long. Once we become Masters, what is left for us?”

Terra found the question rather strange. _What else would she want besides being a Master?_

“You do realize we can suck as Masters, right?” He cut a piece of lamb, but did not eat it. “I mean, there must be _some_ incentive to be good at our jobs. Think of all the opportunities we will get to fail at our missions. Think about this scenario: we could tell Merida to relax about the marriage, and then she murders him.”

Aqua laughed and it sounded genuine, as though he gave her an outlet to relax. He relished the thought that he could help her, even in small ways.

When she was done laughing, she opened her mouth as if to say something, but then stopped herself. She shuffled nervously and played with her food. _Was she expecting a different answer from me?_

“I’m so glad you and I are friends, Terra,” she said softly as she held his forearm. She meant it.

While this should have been fantastic news to Terra, a part of him hurt to hear it.

 

* * *

 

The arrival of the neighboring clan members was met with a welcoming ceremony. Terra stood outside with the other men, garnishing fur on his shoulders. The king requested that all of his men should wear fur, as a representative of his kingdom. Bagpipe performers were there to welcome the guests with their music. Terra knew that Aqua, who was still in the castle, was enjoying it. That was always her favorite part of exploring new worlds: participating in the kinds of ceremonies, traditions, music, and dances that everyone else shared.

All the guests were escorted into the throne room. The suitors did nothing but boast about their accomplishments. Their fathers boasted more. Terra did nothing but keep quiet, not really wanting to be part of this. He could be spending the time differently, with more interesting things to do. Such as sparring. When the feast officially began, he found a table off to the side, away from the thrones where he can sit by himself, a tall mug of ale in his hand. Nothing but a wallflower, watching the other guests converse and play competitive drinking games.

Merida arrived with her parents, followed swiftly by Aqua. Terra had his drink to his lips when he saw her, forgetting that he should be taking a sip of it. Aqua wore a brown dress again, but this one was much more detailed. It was tighter than her simple cotton dress, hugging her curves. When she approached him, he could tell there was some small embroidery detailing the fabric. She had a matching knotted headband around her head, contrasting with her blue hair.

“That looks tight,” he told her, gesturing above her.

Aqua reached to touch her headband as she sat down next to him. “It is. But is that all you have to say?”

_All I have to say?_

Terra never ventured into the territory of actually complimenting her looks. He always forced himself to stay calm when those kinds of feelings swelled. To hint at what he truly thought of her wasn’t anything he needed. Not yet anyway. He needed time.

_But now she’s expecting me to say something._

“You look refined,” he said.

She scoffed and tugged at his fur, a contemptuous smile on her face. “You look refined, too.”

He laughed and sipped his drink. The immediate sensation that followed burned his throat and sent chills up to his forehead. This ale was the strongest he had ever tried. He looked over to Merida, sitting on the throne. It was quite obvious that she was frustrated, a huge scowl on her face as she crossed her arms. She tossed glares toward her mother when the queen wasn’t looking.

“She’s happy,” he said.

“It was incredibly difficult getting her into that corset,” Aqua said, lowering her voice, as if scared that anyone would hear her. “Have you met the suitors?”

Terra leaned over to her and whispered, “they’re idiots.”

Aqua closed her eyes slowly and pursed her lips, taking a long exhale. She quickly shook her head, as though she was trying to shake off the oncoming stress that she undoubtedly felt in the moment. She stared at Terra’s hands.

“What’s that like?” she said with a normal volume to her voice, a gentle nod toward his drink.

“You won’t like it.”

“How would you know that?” She cocked her head to the side.

He looked at her, close enough to see the individual strands of her hair. His peripheral vision was aware of the tightness of her dress, the way it shaped her chest and waist. _Stay calm_. “Because I know you.” 

“So then what, I can’t try the drink out? I can’t relax and let go at a party?” She smiled and her eyes looked like they sparkled. _Stay calm._

An older gentleman sat in front of them. This was a man Terra recognized, who often worked with the cows. He was normally pleasant, and answered any questions Terra had about the sheep. He had his own ale, his breath stinking of alcohol. He hiccuped and burped.

“That’s not a drink for cute ladies, lass, even ones who want to look like boys,” the man said to her.

Aqua’s pleasant expression froze for a bit as she stared at the man. Never, in the entire time that Terra knew her, did she ever tolerate being treated differently because she was a girl. But it wasn’t just this. Aqua could get competitive, sometimes strongly so if she was provoked enough. The flash in her eyes told him this. The worst thing that could ever be said to her was that she was cute.

“We’ll see about that,” she said, in the most polite way she could have mustered it when she looked like she really wanted to slap the man.

She grabbed Terra’s drink from in front of him and took a large gulp. She shivered as her face contorted and her mouth was left open. When she composed herself, she narrowed her eyes at Terra, as if to say that she couldn’t believe he would ever go near such a nasty thing.

The man laughed at her, shaking his head at her hideous expression and took a huge swallow of his own drink.

Another man approached Aqua by her side. He was younger, and wore the red kilt and blue facial paint that labeled him as part of the Macintosh clan. He placed his hand on her shoulder. “What’s a proper lady doing with a drink like that?”

She pulled her shoulder away from his grasp.

“There is no such thing as a _proper_ lady,” she told him, rolling her eyes in the most obvious way she could. She forced herself to drink more of the ale, frowning and distorting her chin with each swallow.

 _There she goes._ Terra knew that she wouldn’t pass the chance of proving these morons wrong.

“Aqua,” Terra whispered to her. “You really haven’t drank this much before. Are you sure you’re going to be okay with this?”

She shot him a glare. _That was the wrong thing to say.  
_

As if betrayed by his questioning, she lifted the mug to her lips, taking several gulps of the ale without stopping. She finished, moaning from the disgust, and slammed the mug on the table. She continued to glare at him, the men around them laughing and teasing about her tenaciousness. She wavered a bit, blinking a bit too much. Her cheeks were flushed, and her frown severe. _I’m not sure drinking that much that fast was a good idea._

The men continued to make jokes about her, and while she tried to interject, they never allowed her to. She was losing the sharp wit that she normally carried. Eventually, she just leaned on her elbows as the men continued to taunt, unable to reply. She held her hand to her head, as though she had a headache. Part of it was probably the headband. Terra, afraid to say anything to provoke her further, watched her.

It was at this time that the queen had announced that a competition of some kind was to be held in order to win Merida’s hand in marriage. Merida declared archery, a skill that she never hesitated to show off on the castle grounds. A skill that he immediately noticed when he first met her in the forest.

“I guess something big is going to happen tomorrow,” he said. “This is probably what we’ve been waiting for.”

“I just want to get all of this over with,” she said sluggishly. “I want to go back home.”

A maid brought Terra another mug of ale. He waved his hand to reject it, but the fact that only Terra was offered it set Aqua on edge.

“Hey, I’m over here, too,” she said as she leaned over the table. The maid set the mug down, but in front of Terra.

He wasn’t able to take a sip of his new drink, because Aqua grabbed it and swallowed some more. _I guess it doesn’t matter. It’s probably better that I stay alert._

“Ugh, why won’t anyone take me seriously here?” she said as she set the mug down and wiped her mouth.

The man from the Macintosh clan leaned over and grabbed her by both of her shoulders. Terra could see that he was massaging them, and his own jaw clenched a bit with anger. The man’s breath was incredibly strong, traveling too far for someone who was slightly drunk.

“Why don’t you learn to behave the way you should, lass? Have some honor? Grow your hair out?” He laughed, clearly amused, and possibly aroused, by her behavior.

Terra started to reach over to push the guy off of her, but Aqua shrugged his shoulders off herself, and stood up to face him. He was a head taller than she was.

“Who gave you permission to grab me?” she asked, her speech the tiniest bit slurred. Terra stood up alongside her, attentive and looking for any small movements that might indicate the start of a struggle.

“Aw, lookit how the girlie thinks she can to talk to me this way.” The man grabbed her arm and attempted to pull her toward him.

Aqua aggressively shook his grip off while reaching for Terra.

She leaned on Terra and kicked the man on the middle of his stomach, sending him backward against the wall behind him. “Don’t touch me!” 

The surrounding men collectively guffawed together, marking on how such a weakling could be overcome by a simple service woman. Terra knew what that meant. Hurt pride. Shameful reputation. A man from a different clan altogether would consider this an insult since represented his own group.

And it seemed that Terra was right. The Macintosh clansman immediately contorted his expression to resemble rage. But the slightest movement that was his first attempt to lunge toward Aqua was thwarted.

Terra stood in front of her, blocked attempts to grab her, and punched him squarely in the jaw. He then grabbed the man by the throat and pushed him back up against the wall.

“Don’t go near her again,” Terra said to him, sternly but softly. A threat only meant for him, not for any one else to hear.

This change in events sparked an uproar among the men that had worked alongside Terra for the past several days. Compliments of how he had grown to be a man were showered on him. Statements such as _looks like we got a brawler_ _in our midst_ were passed around as one of the older men ruffled through Terra’s hair.

But it didn’t make Terra feel any better. The last time he came up against another person in such a way was when he was still in the orphanage. The Macintosh clansman of course was insulted, and called for some sense of justice to right this horrible embarrassment. Lord Macintosh took notice of course, and demanded an explanation.

This was exactly what Terra had wanted to avoid. He could be thrown into the dungeon for this. Aqua was leaning on a chair, her hand to her head. _I can’t leave her alone like this._

The king, however, brushed off any concerns and cries for justice. “What is it, Lord Macintosh? Your men can’t stay away from things that aren’t theirs? Let the man protect his woman.”

Terra was tense and expected some sort of retort from Aqua, who probably didn’t have the judgment anymore to tell her that she shouldn’t speak back to the king. But she didn’t say anything. She actually gazed into his eyes, a pale look on her face. He knew her well enough to understand what they said. They told him she wanted out. That she wanted some comfort from the pounding headache, from all the unwanted attention, and from her own mistakes.

The men continued to grant hard slaps on the back to Terra for growing some real courage, of which Terra had to stop himself from rolling his eyes.

He gently held her elbow and asked her what she wanted. Some alone time and rest, she told him. He began to escort her away from the table until he reached the stairs leading up the ward that should lead him to the royal chambers. He caught sight of the queen, who gestured to him that it would be alright. Merida leaned over to see what was happening, a look of worry plain as day on her face. The noises of the yelling and hollering from the throne room faded away, as was the collective scent of alcohol when they entered the ward.

He held Aqua’s arm as they walked down the halls, asking her to lead him to her room.

“Terra, am I that boyish?” she asked him as she stopped in front of a small wooden door, in a hallway of many.

He pushed the door open for her. “Well, honestly it’s not important. But for your information, you’re absolutely not.”

Her room was tiny, like an ample-sized walk-in closet. There was a small wardrobe and a bed with wool blankets. A candlestick stood on the tiny stool next to the bed, and he lit it. There was a bucket of water for washing and a small window. Better than sharing many bunks with snoring men who smelled of livestock.

He left her leaning on the wall while he looked through her wardrobe.

“I’m going to find you something comfortable to wear, then I’ll leave you to it,” he said as he sifted through some clothes. He heard a thump, and looked over to see her collapsed on her bed, with her shoes and everything else on. “Or not,” he muttered to himself.

He wiggled the boots off her feet and placed them gently on the floor, careful not to disturb her. He then stared at the headband. _Her headache is going to be bad enough when she wakes up._

He reached over to try and take it off, trying not to wake her. But the headband was tight, and it pulled on her hair.

“Don’t touch me!” She slapped him across the nose. He stumbled backward as his face stung and throbbed from the hit. Touching his nose only brought more pain as he groaned out loud.

She sat up quickly. “Terra, is that you?”

“Aqua, who _else_ would it be?” His nose bled a little and he took a rag that laid on her bed rest to his face.

“Oh no, I’m so sorry.” She reached out to him, her eyes squinting.

He held up his free hand and chuckled. “I’m innocent, please spare me.”

She laughed, perhaps a little too much over his pain. “So how did I do?”

“It was a perfect strike. You’ve been practicing,” he said in between some laughs and inspections of the rag to see how much he had been bleeding. He sat on the bed in front of her, noticing that the rag has been showing less signs of blood. “I was trying to get that headband off of you.”

“It is tight.” She nodded while her eyes stayed closed.

“Let me then.”

She stood still and he reached over, trying to find the knots that would untangle such a piece from her hair. She whimpered in pain from his attempts.

“Sorry,” he whispered.

“S’okay.” She stared into his eyes while he continued to struggle with the headpiece. She wore a goofy grin. “Did anyone tell you that they’re the color of the ocean?”

He smirked and shook his head. “You, apparently. Did anyone tell you that your breath stinks?”

She scoffed and he finally set the headpiece loose. She sighed loudly, reaching into her hair as she massaged her scalp. “That feels _so_ much better. Thanks, Terra.”

She leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek. It could have been a grateful, sisterly peck. But it wasn’t. She had kissed him close to his nose, and while it hurt, Terra’s heart was pounding too much for him to care. And she lingered, too. Close enough that he could see how her eyes reflected the light of the candle in the room, searching his own before they wandered downward.

She touched the edge of his lips with her own, soft and puckered. Then she moved to kiss him again, inching closer to him. He allowed himself to lean against her as he kissed her back, taking in the softness of her mouth and relishing the taste of the bitter alcohol, which he truly didn’t mind. This was certainly different - of that he was sure. They had kissed a few years before. It was simple and innocent enough. And it was only done once. But this kind of yearning between them was everything he could have ever wanted. His heart beat so fast, it might as well tear itself out of his chest and dance down the hills outside.

_Am I taking advantage of her, though?_

He held her by her biceps and pushed her away. Her eyes scattered around the room, and she was nodding off. She didn’t ask what went wrong. It didn’t even look she registered what happened.

“What am I going to do with you?” He sighed loudly, unable to control how shaky he sounded. _Stay calm._

“What?” She said this incredibly slowly, as if it took her a while to calculate what he was saying.

A stifled laugh. “You’re a dork.”

“That’s so rude.” She sounded sleepy.

“I think you should rest.”

She smiled sheepishly while her eyes closed. “Okay.”

He laid her down and covered her with the blankets. Blowing out the candle, he tip-toed out of the room and shut the door behind him as quietly as he could. He leaned on the door, unable to control the smile that stretched from ear to ear. He rubbed his face as an attempt to manage his emotions, his hands shaking. Realizing that he was standing in the hallway where all of the maids must have slept. He sneaked out of there, finding the wall panel which would lead him down the secret passage, where he could eventually find his own bed.

He was the only one in the large room. Lying in bed, he tried counting sheep in order to fall asleep. This was futile, though. First of all, he didn’t want to think about sheep when he wasn’t herding them. Secondly, his heart just couldn’t allow it. It beat hard, and Terra tossed and turned as he asked himself what that kiss meant.

Did it mean that she felt something for him? Did it mean that she cared for him in the same way? Did she enjoy it? He was excited at these ideas and was desperate to ask her.

But what if he read her wrong? She was drunk, after all. What if she was just acting up? What if she _regretted_ it?

This last thought hurt most of all, because it meant that he should stop hoping for anything he wanted. His stomach began to grumble, unable to handle all of these conflicting questions. _I hope she doesn’t regret it._

In reality, Terra spent hours in bed, staring at the moon through the window frame until it drifted out of his sight. He then stared at bottom of the bunker above him, analyzing every small detail of that kiss until a time when he couldn’t remember when he had fallen asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **To be Continued...**
> 
>  
> 
> This chapter references Robin Hood (1973) and Brave (2012).
> 
>  **The marvelous softestsilence from Tumblr drew this[adorable art of Terra wearing a kilt](https://softestsilence.tumblr.com/post/175777221260/i-cant-draw-plaid-for-the-life-of-me-blame) based off this chapter**. Thank you so much for it! It's so cute, and I'm so humbled by this!!!
> 
>  **The fabulous holyteapotofrussell from Tumblr created this[amazing comic of Terra and Aqua right before their kiss](http://holyteapotofrussell.tumblr.com/post/179024273500/i-am-having-a-block-so-i-quickly-digitalised-my) as well as [Aqua getting drunk](http://holyteapotofrussell.tumblr.com/post/178742800875/this-is-for-mimiplaysgames-s-side-fic-beloved) based off this chapter**. Thank you so much for the amount of work and effort put into this!! I'm so honored. ;-; ;-;


	4. Volume IV: A Tale of Stars, Pt. 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nine-year-old Terra meets eight-year-old Aqua for the first time, and doesn’t know how to comfort her pain. Or how to handle her at all.
> 
> Rating: K+

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The beginning scene is based on **imaginative-ink‘s stunning Kingdom Hearts/The Lion King[parallel piece](http://imaginative-ink.tumblr.com/post/172706400075/let-me-tell-you-something-someone-once-told-me)**. Thank you so much for allowing me to use this as inspiration!
> 
> I’m back at the fluff... or pseudo-fluff. Not sure what to call my style of fluff. Semi-fluff? Oh well, it’s mine and I have to stand by it. I also took inspiration from elements of American Southern Gothic literature, such as Flannery O’Connor’s “A Good Man is Hard to Find” - SUCH a trip. Then there’s good ol’ bluegrass and country folk for some atmosphere. Yep. Dark fluff. Fluff with lots of childhood fluffy elements mixed with non-fluff. Mine. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Terra knelt down in the dark hallway, overlooking the corner ahead of him. The door to the Master’s office was partly open, a faint light seeping out. This meant that only the lamp was on. The Master would never be able to figure out if something, or someone, was hiding out in the shadows behind him, ready to strike.

Gripping his wooden sword in his hand and whispering a silent promise to save the Master at all costs, Terra scuffled towards the door. The Master was there alright, reading through some papers. The lamp illuminated everything on his desk, but it was barely able to touch the bookshelves, the empty fireplace, or the trophies, gifts, and souvenirs that the Master collected over his many years of being a Keyblade hero. He didn’t notice that Terra was at the door watching him. How clumsy. 

Terra crept as quietly as he could. He froze when the Master sneezed and wiped his face. Onward he went when the coast was clear until he managed to stand behind his father-figure. 

“Take that, freaky _pointy_ monster!” Terra swung his sword and stabbed it up through the ponytail that stood awkwardly out from the top of the Master’s head. 

“If it’s that unsightly, perhaps I should cut it,” Eraqus said, flipping through the pages as though nothing had ever happened.

“But then you won’t be yourself anymore.” Terra pulled his sword out from his latest hunt. His Master was safe. All was good for the night. “I don’t want you to change.”

As if Eraqus suddenly remembered that a young boy needing attention was in the room, he rubbed his eyes and leaned back away from his desk. Terra smiled and nearly jumped. The castle was always empty and quiet unless he was yelling when he ran around, saving any object he picked to be his rescue victim from certain dangers. 

“You have far too much energy so close to bedtime,” Eraqus said, patting the boy’s head. “Let’s go. I’ve spent too much time focusing on these documents that I’ve nearly forgotten to review your studies.”

Terra ran out of the office. He knew where they were going, and he knew he was going to be the perfect student that the Master could ever ask for.  

 

* * *

 

They walked beyond the gardens and out onto a hilly valley where there was a clearing by a small creek. Terra was never allowed this far from the castle by himself, but with Eraqus trailing close behind him, he was allowed to take them wherever he wanted. The creek downhill was the best stop. Terra leaped and tumbled all the way down the hill laughing, until he eventually rolled to a stop. He eyed the stars for a bit until he could hear the Master make his way down the hill in his own pace. 

He swung his legs forward as he stood up. He ran as he circled the area around, looking for his cue. The Master sat down by the creek. _Bingo_. He marked his target, sprinted, and jumped onto the Master’s back from behind. Eraqus let out a loud gasp, and chuckled as he grabbed Terra by the shoulders. 

“I’m getting too old for this,” he said as he flipped Terra over him. The boy knew to land on his feet. 

“How am I supposed to test my awesome skills if I can’t use them on you?” Terra rolled over to a kneeling position as he settled on his knees. 

Eraqus cleared his throat as if to make a protest and Terra realized his mistake. “Sir. I need to test my awesome skills on you in order to improve, Master sir.” 

The Master chuckled and gently shook his head. “Three years you have been my pupil and I still have to remind you at times to mind the hierarchy of which you work under.” 

Terra laughed. “Whoops.” He then cleared his own throat. “Uh, I mean, whoops, sir.”

A smile under that bushy mustache formed, and Eraqus didn’t attempt to hide it. He never really hid any of his laughs. But Terra knew better than to relax when his lessons were going to be discussed. 

“Well now, your studies,” the Master began. “I’ve had you read two books on the formations of all worlds. If I am not mistaken, you have read on a brief history of the great Keyblade War, and the legends that tell of how the worlds were separated. Here is your question: no matter which world you would visit, no matter who you may end meeting someday in the future, what is the one thing that will always be present?“

Terra looked down at the fists he was making on his thighs, his knees buried into the grass. _What is the right answer?_

He knew that the Master always told him that no answer was a perfect one. He was never given tests. He was always questioned verbally. He was always given assignments to write out his interpretations. But sometimes he made mistakes. And if he ever wanted to be Keyblade Master one day, he needed to do perfect.

He raised his head to meet his Master’s gaze. “The worlds used to all be one, under the light of Kingdom Hearts. When they separated, they carried with them a piece of that original whole. Light will always be there.” He held his breath.

“That was perhaps the most excellent answer I could have asked out of you,” the Master said with an exhale through his nose. He rubbed the hair on Terra’s head. “You have been growing so much as a student these past few years.”

“Master, I have a question.”

“Please, elaborate.”

“Well, it sounds like you have to _know_ that light is going to be there, giving life to each world. But _how_ do you know that it’s there?”

“Simple. You merely have to look up towards the sky.”

“The... sky, sir?” Twinkling stars were spread across every inch of the black sky above him. 

“Yes. The light we are speaking of are the hearts of every world out there. Much like your own heart is beating a beam of light.” Eraqus leaned closer, as Terra was entranced by the truth of the stars. All these years he watched them sit there, ever since he set foot on these mountains. “And we can see them,” the Master continued, “spread across the sky. I cannot demonstrate just how far away they really are from us, and yet their light can still be seen. They all shine down, like a million lanterns upon us.” 

Terra continued to stare upward as he thought about what was told to him. He placed a hand on his chest. “What about my light? Can that be seen?”

Eraqus laughed silently. “The light within each of us is bright, that is for certain. Not the same size as the heart of a world. These worlds we are seeing are very large, so we can see them this far away. But your light is there, all the same.”

“Then how do I know that it’s there? Is there a way I can look at it?”

Eraqus smile transformed into a hard line, and Terra swallowed a lump in his throat. _What did I say that was so wrong?_

The Master closed his eyes and let out a slow breath, as if to calm himself. “Terra, you remember how I have told you that a Keyblade is an extremely dangerous weapon in the wrong hands.”

“Y-yes, sir.” Hearts were made of light and darkness. He remembered. “It is forbidden to harm, to touch, or to remove a heart.”

His Master’s expression of sternness softened, and he nodded. “You must have faith that it will always be there to guide your way. And your heart will connect with others, like mine. The light you create as you form these bonds will burn brighter, and will continue to shine on whatever path you take. Do you understand what that means?”

“That if I have friends, and if I have you, I can’t go wrong?” _Please let that be the right answer._

“Yes, that’s right. I will always be there to watch over you.” The Master ruffled through Terra’s hair again, seemingly with more to say, but he stopped himself short. “Speaking of making connections, Terra, firstly I want to say that I am sorry I haven’t been able to spend as much time with you as normal.”

Terra wanted to say that he wished they could play together more often. But the Master was very busy doing important things and being a hero. “It’s okay, sir.”

Eraqus smiled but shook his head. _Is he happy and sad at the same time?_

“Well,” the Master said, “I have been studying information on a certain incident that happened far away in another world. A great darkness has appeared, and I’m afraid something terrible has happened.”

“Sir?”

Eraqus took a deep breath. “A darkness as black as what had just appeared will be old and powerful. It tried to target a child there. She could be someone that may join our school here. Maybe you might get to make a new friend.”

“A new friend?” Terra had the orphanage behind, although those kids weren’t exactly friends. He used to writer letters to them often, but eventually the letters he received in return dwindled down until he wrote to nothing but silence. It hurt too much after a while to continue writing.

“Yes. Whether she joins us is up to her. But I want you to listen carefully. She will be grieving the loss of her parents. I would like to take you there with me. I hope that your presence there will help comfort her. Our main concern is not that she should join, but that she remains safe and that she heals from her pain.” 

“Yes, Master. I will do my best.” He didn’t know what to expect. He didn’t know what was expected of him either, or how to make someone who lost her parents feel better. He never knew his own, after all. 

They continued to star-gaze as time slipped by without them noticing. It was only when Terra started yawning that Eraqus finally suggested going back to the castle. The boy didn’t remember how he got from walking back up the hill to being carried into his room. That short nap sufficed enough, however. When all was dark and he thought about light and how it must be shining from his heart, Terra left his bed. The Master said that he had light for certain. It still didn’t make sense, though. He carefully made his way to face his mirror, trying not to trip over the mess he always seemed to neglect. He attempted to summon magic, to summon light - to see if maybe, in this dark room, he can see his own shining. But he saw nothing. 

 

* * *

 

After breakfast, Terra raced to the Master’s office. He was all ready to go, which meant that the day was starting perfectly. This mission should pass with ease. With the sun shining through the windows, he could see exactly what the Master was reading the night before. The papers were fairly large, the lettering handwritten. They were tied together with ribbons, so they weren’t exactly in a book quite yet. Sprawled open was a couple of paragraphs of text, and a hand-painted image of a man with his shoulders slumped over. It looked like he was completely covered in oil, with his hair the color of the wine the Master liked to drink. He was drawn with one hand lifted up like a claw, oil dripping far below it. 

The Master broke his gaze from the painting. “Terra, do you remember what I said when it comes to traveling to other worlds?”

Terra stood as straight as he could, the perfect posture for a Keyblade wielder. “That the worlds need to keep their balance restored, so we can’t talk about things like Keyblades or the existence of other worlds. If we have to use magic or if we have to fight, we let the people make up their own reasons to explain what they saw. Keyblade wielders will fade away as legends that they share stories about.”

“Very good.” The Master traced his fingers on the text. “This will be the darkness that she must be protected from.”

“Who is he?”

“There is no formal name. The records here have different ways to call him. The Shadow Man. The Man in the Hat. The Man in the Long Black Coat.” The Master exhaled slowly. “He was human, once. Traded his heart for darkness when he was betrayed by his family, and he has festered for a few hundred years since. There is mention here that he may be blind, but that is not confirmed. I wonder if that has anything to do with how he seeks out light.”

Terra swallowed a lump in his throat. On the one hand, this was too scary. On the other, he was too little to do anything and be a hero.

“Your job, Terra, is to make sure she stays comfortable.” The Master began to leave his office, leaving the pages open on his desk. 

“Why would he go after her?”

“All children have a bright light within them. I suppose hers is particularly bright enough for him to desire. You see, light attracts darkness, and darkness hunts light. Part of being a Keyblade wielder means that we do not allow the darkness to consume anything.”

Terra stopped for a moment, his hand on his heart. What if the Shadow Man went after his own light? Assuming he had a strong light anyway. Maybe the reason why he couldn’t see it was because it was actually dim and weak. But this wasn’t an appropriate time to ponder such a question. The Master kept going ahead of him, and the boy silenced his thoughts as he ran after. 

 

* * *

 

All the roads in that smallest of towns were made of dirt. They had initially landed in a larger town further up north, only to find out they were in the wrong place. The girl apparently had moved with her parents from there to a sizeable farmhouse out in the countryside. So the Master and his pupil walked south, past what looked like an endless ocean of green fields and forests. But the heat was the worst. Even though he was wearing a loose shirt and khaki shorts, it was humid and oppressive, like something was applying pressure to his skin, and there was no breeze to comfort. 

The smaller town bore a few houses, a post office, a general store that seemed to be the only one to exist in the entire place, and a railroad train station. Every building was made of wood. It was weird to Terra, to say the least, how tiny this place was. Nothing like the enormous city he was from. Inside the general store sat two women in cotton dresses and sun hats, and a man wearing overalls who was smoking a cigar. Eraqus bought Terra a lime-flavored soda pop to cool him off and some fudge with almonds. The Master then made a passing comment that, considering how humid it was, the winters here must be the kind that seeped into the bones. This sounded like a good idea to Terra.

Eraqus introduced himself to the two women there as an investigator from the nearby city. He began asking them questions, although they were the kind of women to blabber on and on about gossip. They didn’t need any questions.

“I don’t know what kind of sins they’ve committed to have what happened delivered onto them-” one began.

“Oh no, they hadn’t done nothing to deserve that. I knew them-” the other followed.

“Yes, yes. Saints they were. And that poor little girl-”

“It happened right in the middle of the day. In the bright sunshine-”

“I heard the darlin’ didn’t see anything. She was in school-”

“And everything was gone-”

“Yes, everything. The entire farmhouse house was burned to the ground. And did you hear-”

“About their livestock? Coroner said that they were all poisoned-”

The women were incredibly enamored with these stories, almost as if what they were discussing wasn’t actually terrible. The man with the cigar interrupted them, waving his free hand around as he got excited over his own information.

“Things ain’t the same no more. Before, you used to trust a man with your own huntin’ dog,” he said.

The women nodded and agreed with him. One of them lifted her hands up and said, “Amen.”

“Somethin’s amiss,” he continued. “Ever since that man came into town.”

Eraqus at this point took his turn to interrupt, his arms crossed. “I have come to investigate him as well. Can you tell me more?”

The man took a slow puff of his cigar. “You from the city? Listen here, you city folk don’t know what yer doing. It’s because of you people that our quiet town is gettin’ corrupted.” He took another puff. 

One of the ladies spoke. “The strange man _must_ have been from the city. No one’s seen him before-”

The other took this cue to join in. “Yes, and all those horrible stories I’m starting to hear. Have you heard about-”

“Jim Bob going mad? Yes, I heard. Peaceful man otherwise-”

“And then he lost his rockers out in the woods and beat his horse dead-”

“It’s terrible business. And the fog we are getting out west? It’s too hot for that-”

“And several farmers talking about how their crops are rotting-”

“And of course, the preacher’s daughter-”

“She was blossoming into such a nice young lady-”

The man with the cigar interrupts again. “We had some men round up to try huntin’ this guy down after hearing about her disappearance. He’s the biggest suspect we have in these violent crimes. He came here once. Sat right there.” He pointed to a specific table, right in front of Terra. “I swear on the Good Book that there was dust on ‘im.”

Eraqus again took this opportunity. “Did he give a name?”

The man groaned a bit. “Ardyn. Funny name. Dressed like a homeless person, too. He had a funnier surname that I can’t recall. But I swear on the Good Book, this land has been forsaken. The devil’s afoot.” 

“I see.” Eraqus grabbed a map that was on display. “The girl who lost her parents, where is she staying now?”

One of the women spoke. “She’s staying with the Widow Tweed, a neighbor. Due south. You’ll pass by the girl’s old farm on the way. May the Lord continue to bless her.”

The Master then ended the conversation by asking for directions to the girl’s lost farm, promising to investigate the crops, the insane farmers, and the preacher’s missing daughter. Terra felt relieved when they left the store, happy to have some peace and quiet. 

“Those people are a little crazy,” he said loud enough for the Master to hear.

Eraqus chuckled, probably thinking the same thing. Nevertheless, the Master gave Terra a long lecture about how he should always give people the benefit of the doubt, and to help others even when they didn’t seem like they deserve it. A good Keyblade wielder would be able to use proper judgment when the time came. 

They passed by a group of boys playing together. Terra eyed them, since it was years that he had seen other kids. Eraqus asked him if he would like to play with them, since it was hard enough for Terra to be the only student at the academy. In truth, Terra wanted to, but memories of him being kicked and shunned by the other children at the orphanage flood his mind. He replied with a simple _no_ , keeping his eyes ahead to where the Master was leading him, beyond the town limits. 

 

* * *

 

It was yet another long walk, sweat dripping down his sides and soaking his shirt. They passed by what Terra assumed was the remains of the girl’s farmhouse. If it still stood, it would have been wide, and it seemed that it could have been two stories tall. In its state now, everything was charred black, and the house was reduced to just some of its foundations. There was an abandoned barn nearby, the door to it barely hanging on. The outer walls to the barn had some scorch marks. The grass was starting to overgrow, and it was quiet. 

This used to be someone’s home. This girl would never come back to sleep in her bed, or talk to her parents again. What if that were to happen, where the Master left and never came home? Terra gripped Eraqus’ robes as the Master surveyed the damage. He reminded Terra how important it was to make sure that the girl was comforted, because this was her dire time of need. 

It wasn’t long after that through some woods that they came across another, livelier farm. It was far smaller than the destroyed one, although homely. A barn also stood behind this house, and Terra can see a chicken roaming around as some laundry hung on a wooden hamper. Further south was another farm in the distance - it looked functional but was much more run-down than this one. Behind these farms were nothing but forests and shrubbery. 

Eraqus knocked on the door and a middle-aged woman with a round face donning glasses answered the door, introducing herself as the Widow Tweed. The Master went through the same lie, where he was an investigator and a counselor, and asked about the girl. The widow invited them in and gave Terra a glass of water while she spoke of the girl.

“I just couldn’t leave her all alone, the poor thing is far too young to go through such a disaster,” she said as she shook her head. Her voice was incredibly soft and compassionate. “I try my best to keep things normal for her. I take her to school, and I encourage her to continue her dance lessons. Aqua hasn’t really cried much yet from what I’ve seen, but I’m not sure what she’s doing when she’s by herself. I suppose her mood is going to change everyday.”

Eraqus smiled gently as he sipped his own water. “She’s blessed to have you there for her.” 

When Terra finished his drink, the widow offered to take the glass from him. He remembered that it was absolutely necessary for him to be on his best behavior. “Thank you, ma’am,” he said as she took it.

She got absolutely giddy with his reaction. “He is _so_ polite, it’s nice to see that children are still being raised with manners.” This meant he did well. She put the glass on her kitchen counter. “I don’t have much space for you, but the two of you can stay in the barn with Abigail. She’s a good girl, so she shouldn’t bother you much.”

There was no telling who Abigail was, but Eraqus was more concerned about Terra being able to meet Aqua before talking to her himself. 

Mrs. Tweed lifted her hand to her face. “The only living thing that has truly helped her is Tod, my pet fox. She spends most of her time with him. She’s out back. Terra can go talk to her if he pleases.”

Eraqus placed a firm hand on Terra’s shoulder. It was a lie if Terra didn’t say he was nervous. He was always horrible at making friends, so how he could he help her when he didn’t know anything about her? Still, this was a mission, and he could not fail. 

Just beyond the brick fencing that kept Mrs. Tweed’s farm intact, he saw her. She sat on a rock, her blue hair done in pigtails. She wore a simple blue cotton dress with a pink plaid apron, and a fox rested on her lap. When he approached her, she looked up at him, her incredibly large sapphire eyes emotionless.

“Hi, Aqua,” he said as he weakly waved his hand. “I’m Terra. My Master and I are guests at your house.” It was probably a stupid thing to say, but he had nothing else.

She stared at him with a blank expression for a bit before looking back down to pet Tod. _What am I supposed to say now?_

Maybe he could ask who did her hair that way. Maybe he could ask about her parents. No, that was a stupid idea. That would make her sad. Maybe the fox?

“That’s a nice fox you have there,” he said. And he hated the way he said it. 

“His name’s Tod,” she said. Her voice was incredibly small, so low that if there was any other noise besides the sound of crickets, he wouldn’t have heard her. 

“That’s a nice name.” And the conversation ended. He could ask how Tod got such a name, or he could ask if she liked to play with him. These seemed like more stupid questions and Terra found himself wishing that the Master was there to help him. 

Tod’s ears perked up, and the fox searched in one direction with his eyes. A puppy came running toward them, although the first thing it did was sniff Terra’s ankles. There was no way to avoid it - Terra was gleeful at the sight, and bent down to rub the belly of the hound dog that was jumping up at him. 

“His name is Copper,” he heard Aqua say, in that same small voice. “He’s Tod’s best friend.” She eyed him, waiting for his reply. 

This was strange. A fox and a hound dog share some similar genes, but one was clearly meant to attract the attention of the other, and the other was meant to hunt down the one. 

“Aren’t they kind of... opposites?” Terra asked. “I mean, isn’t a hound dog supposed to be trained to hunt and trap a fox?”

It must have been the question, because Terra knew that he didn’t mean to hurt her feelings. Her gaze fell to the ground as Tod jumped off her lap to wrestle with Copper and she kept quiet. She didn’t look as though she was going to cry, but it was an expression that told him her dreams were crushed. 

“Well,” he said, rubbing his arms, “if they want to be friends, then they can be friends. They don’t have to follow what people expect them to. This is a sign that every living thing can coexist and...” He stopped. He was blabbing, and he knew that no one liked it. 

Aqua again didn’t reply to him, and simply stood up to leave him alone as she followed Tod and Copper when they raced into the woods. _That sucked._

Not that Eraqus did any better. She came back with Tod during the evening, when Mrs. Tweed introduced her to him. Upon hearing that he was a grief counselor, Aqua simply turned away to walk upstairs. 

“I already spoke to counselors,” she muttered, without even looking Eraqus in the eye. 

The Master didn’t seem upset by her reaction, and simply let her walk away without saying anything. He stopped Mrs. Tweed from apologizing, giving his understanding to the situation. She thus showed the two of them the barn where they would be staying. Abigail was a tall cow, and only a cow could look that bored while she munched on the hay that was laid before her. Terra couldn’t help himself but to pet her, and he giggled loudly when she mooed at him. The sound was so loud, and so ridiculous. 

“Keep at it, and we’ll never be able to go to sleep,” he heard the Master say. Eraqus was already adjusting some loose hay that stood in piles in the corner of the barn. 

Terra jumped onto a pile. It was spongey, but warm. It was already a warm, humid night, and this was unpleasant. Still, he knew better than to complain too much. A Keyblade wielder never bickered about the kindness of strangers. 

“I can’t seem to talk to her, Master,” he said as he stared at the ceiling. High in the barn was an open window, and he can see a sky full of stars. 

Eraqus sighed. “You need to have patience. She’s grieving. Her emotions will be all over the place. You need to expect that some days will be really hard, and some days she will act more normally.” 

Terra wanted to hear that it would get easier. That it couldn’t be this hard. But having patience in this moment meant nothing. 

“But I don’t even _know_ how to talk to her.” Terra sounded like he was whining, but he couldn’t help himself.

The Master stood up. “You do not need to know anything. You just need to wait patiently. Have faith that she wants and needs someone to talk to - we all do when we are hurting. When the time is right for her, she will open up.”

He made it sound so easy.  Terra didn’t ask any more questions, and the Master pulled out a necklace with an elaborate knot. It looked like the kind of necklace that he picked up on some faraway world, just like all the trinkets he had in his office. He gave it to Terra, and motioned him to wear it.

When Terra put it on, the Master placed two fingers on the decorative knot. A light shined brightly. “I have put a spell on this,” Eraqus said. “It is a protective spell. It can only be used once, so remember my words. If anything were to happen, the first thing you will need to remember is to stay calm. The second thing to remember is that the spell will transport you to a place near me. You then have to find me. Do I make myself clear?” 

Terra grabbed the knot and hid it under his shirt, determined to memorize the words. Step one, stay calm. Step two, find the Master. 

“Yes, sir.” It was far easier than dealing with her. 

**_To be continued..._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **This chapter makes references to The Fox and the Hound (1981)**.  
>  This chapter also makes references to Joan Osborne’s “The Man in the Long Black Coat.”


	5. Volume V: A Tale of Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fourteen-year-old Aqua and fifteen-year-old Terra learn a tough lesson. But they stay together, through the secrets they share.  
>  **Rating: T**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back in Terraqua Day of this year (I think April or May?), I created this headcanon that featured Terra and Aqua in their secret spot where they sparred, where they kept a journal full of secret recipes. It eventually appeared as a flashback in I think Chapter 12 of my longfic. This story was an expansion of that book, and was supposed to be a flashback meant for the second half of my longfic (which is now a sequel). It had switched places with the story that was supposed to take this spot. I will indulge on the long behind-the-scenes story of the development of this story at the end notes. All of my WIPs will cross-reference each other, and this one will be one that will be pretty relevant, so I’m happy to finally have it out. Eraqus is quite an implosive character. It’s hard depicting him in between polar opposites of loving father and extremist.

The whole point of venturing out into the wilderness was to get some peace and quiet for the two of them. Aqua knew on some level this expectation was a little ironic, given the fact that when their Keyblades clashed, they would be making a ton of noise.

It was the job of the Keyblade wielder to make sure that the nature of such things was kept secret when they visited worlds. If they wanted to spar, they would have to do it away from prying eyes. Some of Eraqus’ contacts in this world already knew about it, yet his two students had no choice but to follow the rules.

But no spot was good enough for their training - and how could any be? This world was nothing short of _spectacular_. The trees were massive, and so tall that she nearly fell backward trying to gaze at the canopies above her. The mountains here were far more impressive than the ones back home, and they were all covered in snow, although the valleys were still vibrant with green. Some of the rivers hustled through shrubbery, while others clashed into glaciers. While it was far too cold for her (so cold, in fact, that Eraqus’ contacts have gifted all of them leather and fur pelts with amazingly soft hoods for warmth), Terra absolutely embraced the environment.

Which was why he led the way. Every time they thought they picked a nice spot for their practice, he got interested in some other river, some other waterfall, some other ledge, some chipmunk, or a moose, and every nook and cranny he cast his eyes on.

Aqua eyed his shoulders, of all things, as he went ahead. He was soon to turn sixteen, and it showed. He was suddenly a head taller than her, when they have always been the same height. His voice continued to get deeper, while hers remained stable for a long time. And his shoulders… was that the pelt making them look wider or was it really him? He was so lanky otherwise.

His Keyblade, Earthshaker, also showed some signs of change. It grew longer and wider, much to Terra’s contentment. She had once rolled her eyes when they summoned their Keyblades for the very first time. He had cried out that he was going to have the biggest, strongest, most _awesomest_ Keyblade that ever existed, and whatever other silly bragging rights that eleven-year-old boys believed were important at that age.

It made sense that certain things had to change at some point. Aqua was not getting nearly as tall, but she was changing in other ways. She definitely noticed the growing pains, how her body was starting to make her look more adult, and the fact that she now had to take care of herself on a monthly basis. Eraqus even bought a book on women’s health for her, admitting that he unfortunately had no knowledge of such things, but if she ever needed a companion to talk to.... Red-faced and stumbling on her words, she graciously accepted the book, thanked him for it, and never brought the subject up with her Master again.

Her book even had sections explaining how young boys developed into men. It made her blush to think about Terra going through such things, and it was one of the reasons why she never asked him about it. She never once asked him if Eraqus started any conversations, either. She just didn’t think he would be receptive to such an inquiry.

Terra used to be a lively boy. Always with energy, always shifting between moods where he was easily distracted and couldn’t choose between any of the activities they shared together, and moods where he was so focused on his homework that he didn’t dare speak to her. Except when he wanted to. And anytime he did, the enthusiasm that followed was undeniable. He used to wear a large beaming smile so easily.

He still smiled just as often, but now they were slightly muted. They were still sincere and well-felt, but he had become timid. More laid back, more patient with things. His enthusiasm carried itself with a softer voice. She could still rely on him to always be ready for an adventure or some sparring. But it was just… different. As she followed Terra through the woods, she told herself she would just have to adjust.

He stopped by some berry bushes and rested his hands on his waist. “I bet this world is three times the size of ours,” he said before clicking his tongue. “I wish we didn’t have to stay close to the village.”

The clearing they stopped by opened up to a larger, grassy plain that stretched far beyond what she could see. There was plenty of space here for them to practice.

“Why not this spot?” she asked for the tenth time that day. The sun graced her face. She removed her hood and freed her long, wavy ponytail.

“Hey, do you think these wildberries are edible?” He bent over to inspect them. “If I win our next match, you have to eat one.”

Aqua scoffed with a slight breath. Maybe she was just freaking out, and he will always be the same old Terra.

“Or, I make _you_ eat one,” she said, conscious that she said it with tease.

He crossed his arms and bit his lip. It was an attempt at hiding a smile, and it failed. “Are you scared you won’t win?”

“How about I don’t want to be used as a guinea pig and poisoned?”

He laughed. It was gentler than the ones he used to let out in the years before, but there was still a trace of familiarity. “I think you’ll live. You don’t even have to swallow it.”

She resorted to smacking him across the arm. Which only made him laugh more. Until his eyes went wide and his smile fell. Until his arms dropped to the side. He wasn’t looking at her, but past her shoulders.

Behind her was a dark brown bear cub, rummaging out of the bushes. Small, furry, and absolutely adorable, it eyed the two of them. But that meant-

“Aqua!”

The mother, a grizzly bear more than a head taller than Terra, burst out from where the cub came from. She roared as she charged up to them, swiping a claw.

Aqua jumped backward, right into Terra. He wrapped his arms around her, but tripped. They both fell, and the bear roared louder, attempting to pounce on them. Aqua had one hand on Terra’s chest as she leaned forward, as if she was trying to protect him. She screamed and waved her arm, defaulting to the one spell that was easiest for her.

The bear roared and it was simply horrid. The sound vibrated through the grass and echoed across the woods. Mother bear scuffed and huffed, and disappeared among the trees, her cub closely following.

It was now silent, but the both of them were breathing hard. The thought of what she did immobilized her, and she trembled as she slowly brought her hand to her lips.

“Are you okay?” she heard Terra ask her.

She had used Blizzard against an animal. And the Master will be furious. “Terra, I attacked the bear.”

“Y-you didn’t have a choice.”

She didn’t look at him. That wasn’t a good enough answer, and they both knew it.

“What is the Master going to say?” she said, successfully holding back a choke. Under no circumstances was she going to cry, even though she really wanted to.

Terra held her by the shoulders and turned her to face him. “You didn’t mean to.” He looked right into her eyes as he said this. His words usually helped. But not this time. When she stared back, giving him no expression she was comforted, he simply continued. “I’ll take care of it.”

Aqua blinked for a few moments. “What?”

From the woods came Eraqus, dressed in his own coat of pelt and fur, and Denahi, a village storyteller and wise man, carrying a spear. The man’s hair had streaks of gray, and he twisted several long strands of it into a knot. All of the villagers assumed they were from beyond the mountain where the aurora lights touched the ground – except for Denahi, who knew the truth. He had been so generous to them, so happy over their visit, so genuinely interested in getting to know the two star pupils that Eraqus gushed about. The embarrassment the Master would feel once Denahi heard about what she did…

“We heard a horrendous shriek,” Eraqus said. “Are you two alright?”

Aqua took a moment to compose herself. She told herself that she was ready for the punishment. That it would all pass. That time would make them all eventually forget this awful moment ever happened. That maybe Terra would crack a joke about it in the future.

Terra said, “A mother bear attacked, sir.”

Eraqus kept his face stern, but Denahi softened. “No one can deny how protective a bear will be of her children,” the wise man said. “The spirits have certainly shown you their favor.” In this world, the people believed that light was utilized through their deceased ancestors, who would perform miracles.

The Master crossed his arms. “A blessing indeed. What exactly happened?”

Aqua slowly opened her mouth to say something, but-

“I cast Blizzard on the bear,” Terra said.

The whimper that escaped her nose was incontrollable, but she kept it quiet enough that no one heard it. She didn’t know what was worse – harming a wild animal or lying to the Master. She couldn’t say anything. She couldn’t do anything - step on Terra’s foot or elbow him in the ribs, without giving his fib away.

Oh, but it was worse, seeing how Eraqus’ brows furrowed more and more, and how hard his lips pursed before he opened his mouth. The one thing Terra slaved over the entire time she knew him was the Master’s approval. For the Master to be pleased with him. His congratulations. Terra believed any setback was proof he was failing. It was knowing this that was making her nauseous.

“You mean to tell me,” the Master started, sternly, “that two very talented Keyblade wielders, who have all of these powers and useful spells at their disposal, were unable to deflect any attack, and that you _aimed to attack the bear instead_?” The Master yelled so loud that she heard some squirrels and birds scatter about.

She felt Terra tense up beside her. “Yes, sir,” Terra said. She was surprised with how smooth it sounded.

Eraqus nearly growled, not putting any effort in lowering his volume. “I can’t believe what I am hearing. You know how unforgivable it is to abuse your gifts on innocent beings, let alone a _wild animal_.” He took a moment to breathe, seemingly in an effort to calm himself. But it seemingly failed. “You are to head back to the castle immediately. You will write _fifty pages_ on the importance of life, how light and darkness make up all of its components, and how a Keyblade can be used to destroy, with _specific_ awareness of its lack of ability to create. All chores to be done within the next three months are yours alone.”

Aqua clenched her fists as tightly as she could, although she couldn’t pierce the thickness of her gloves. Still, the tension kept her focused, when she really wanted to object. But objecting would make them both suspicious.

Terra bowed to Eraqus, his movement stiff but stable. “Yes, Master.”

Eraqus still kept his arms crossed, locking eyes with Terra. “I’m so disappointed in you.”

She crept a glance at Terra, who finally looked hurt. What was definitely worse than the punishment was hearing this from the Master.

Terra turned away, but not without catching her glance and nodding slightly in return. As if to say that it was alright. That he had it under control.

Which was the exact problem. He was the only one between the two of them who felt that way. He depended on her to keep this up for his sake. And she was the wrong person to do it. _He_ was the one that was better with rolling with the punches. This wasn’t the same as when she would use magic to fix anything he broke. To fix his worst injuries so the Master wouldn’t find out. And still, _he_ was the one to do the talking. She didn’t know how to act out a lie, and was never interested in playing tricks on the Master. Messing up meant that it would make his punishment worse.

She wished she could say this to him. To ask him what to do or say. Then she wished he didn’t lie in the first place.

Terra moved out into the woods, farther away from the village. Presumably to summon his glider and fly out without anyone seeing him. So as what was expected out of him, he followed the rules.

Although the rules said to never deceive Eraqus.

Denahi talked about how they should track the bear in case she needed her wounds to heal. That bears weren’t equipped to recover from such unique injuries. That it may be threatening to her life. It didn’t help Aqua to hear any of this. Now she had to deal with the guilt of taking a mother away from its offspring.

The three of them hiked through the woods, following the bear’s tracks. Denahi was the expert in searching for signs, such as dips in the dirt, broken twigs, scratched tree barks, shed fur, and swayed bushes.

Eraqus rubbed his forehead and sighed. “I don’t know what I’m going to do with that boy.”

“Master, he was only trying to help me,” Aqua said _. Help_ was the wrong word to use. She should have said _protect me_. She was lucky she was walking behind her Master so that he didn’t see her face.

“I understand that very well,” Eraqus said, but with such ferocity that he almost sounded offended by her remark. “But the impulses that are driving him worry me. He shouldn’t even have the instinct to attack first.”

The knots in Aqua’s stomach twisted. This wasn’t fair to Terra at all. She thought about all the things she could do for him. Cook him something special? No, that was pathetic. She already made things he liked so it was not good enough of a thank-you gift. What she had to do, definitely, was to write his essay for him. To do the chores for him. She had to do as much as possible whenever she had a chance to do it discreetly.

Denahi waited for them to catch up with him. “Calm yourself, Eraqus. I believe the only driving factor leading Terra to his decisions is love. And if you were to ask my opinion, I think he is on a great path to manhood, so long as he keeps that motivation.”

 _Love_ wasn’t the word Aqua would have used, but it fit perfectly. Of course Terra did that out of love. The three of them all loved each other. They were a family. Maybe hearing this would make the Master ease up on Terra. A little bit, at least?

“Need I remind you, my friend, that there is such a fine line between love and revenge? Or love and anger?” Eraqus said, at which Denahi laughed out loud.

“All I’m saying is that he reminds me a bit of my brother,” the wise man replied. “Impulsive. Reckless. Good intentions. But I see your point. Kenai went through all sorts of trouble.”

This was the third time she heard Kenai’s name being mentioned, but she and Terra had yet to meet him.

The sun was setting, painting the sky pink, when they finally found the bear. There were open sores grazing her snout, her cheek, and down the side of her neck, surrounded by patches of missing fur. Some already looked infected. She knew that Blizzard may be an ice-based spell, but it was so cold that it burned to the touch. This was excessive, though. The plan was for Eraqus to bind the bear with his magic. For Aqua to protect the cub. For Denahi to inspect the mother’s condition before deciding on the next step.

But one look at them sent the bear into a rage, charging directly for Aqua. Even if Eraqus was taller, and definitely more of a threat, the bear knew who the real damage dealer was. Ignoring all of Eraqus’ attempts to catch her attention, the bear lunged at Aqua. She reflected the attack. The bear replied with another shrieking roar, and ran off, cub in tow.

Denahi approached by her side, asking if she was okay. Aqua stabilized her breathing, unable to look at the Master when she felt the weight of his gaze at her. Denahi remarked about how the bear focused specifically on her, and she winced. She couldn’t keep doing this.

She breathed through her nose as she found her voice. “I’m sorry, Master." 

 

* * *

 

The stars sparkled across the dark sky when they reached the castle back in the Land of Departure. Eraqus marched through the main doors, throwing them open, and barked so loudly that his voice echoed off the walls.

“TERRA!” He stood in the middle of the entrance hall. Faint footsteps could be heard approaching the room. Terra kept his head up when he finally appeared through the back door that led to the east wing. He must have been in the library.

Terra took his place by Aqua’s side, but he kept it professional. Military stance, attentive, and clearly just _tight_. He did a better job than she in keeping his emotions elusive when the moment called for it.

Eraqus’ eyes flickered. Something about Terra moving to Aqua’s side must have struck a nerve with him. What it could be was something she couldn’t calculate. She had never seen her Master fuming this much.

“I’m pleased to see that the two of you understand the importance of camaraderie,” the Master said, with a tone that oozed so much sarcasm, Aqua’s chest became tight. “But I don’t understand what gave either of you the idea that it could be used to conspire against me.”

Terra gaped, incredulous. “Master-”

“You lied to me.”

The sentence was only four words long. And yet Aqua found herself as speechless as she was when her parents died. She hoped Terra wasn’t mad at her, too.

“A Keyblade wielder,” Eraqus continued, “should mind when darkness should seek to overtake their hearts. They should practice judgment with their best intentions. But most importantly, they should look out for the well-being of their partners. They should _hold each other accountable at all costs_ , so not to let themselves go astray.”

Aqua looked right in between her Master’s eyes, because she didn’t feel particularly brave enough to look directly into them. Even when he addressed her.

“I’ll have you understand, Aqua, that you will take over the fifty-page thesis. And the chores.” He then faced his oldest student. “Terra, you will come with me. The two of us will be minding over the bear first thing in the morning. We will be gone for a few weeks.”

Eraqus paused for a moment. “I expected better out of the both of you. _Neither_ of you will have any sort of contact until I say so. Starting now. If you want to uphold your fellowship and your bond with such honor, then you will learn to cherish it. You will learn the value of having a proper companion that you can rely on to keep you on the path of light.”

The words hung in the air. Terra bowed. “Yes, Master.” It was slower than usual, but it was convincing enough. But that was him, being better at hiding his feelings.

Aqua eventually bowed herself and said the same. Numbly. She and Terra didn’t dare to look at each other. She walked briskly through the back door leading to the west wing. The one place she needed to be right now was her bedroom. She felt Terra’s presence fade away back to the east. Eraqus soon followed him. Even though he wasn’t around, she walked through the hallways leading up to her door, not uttering a word.

Her bedroom was a sizeable one, and Aqua let out a huge breath of relief when she arrived. The bed was comfortable. The sheets a dark blue. Lining her walls were hand-made decorations – crochet, tapestries, small quilts and the like. The same types of things her mother made when they all still lived in that farmhouse. On her desk was a framed black and white portrait of her parents. The frame was thick enough to cover most of the scorch marks that bordered the photograph. Her mother with long hair that draped over her lacey dress, smiling warmly, comfortable in front of the camera. Her father, with a moustache so fluffy that she couldn’t see his lips, wearing a vest and top hat. Next to that photo, taped against the wall, was a rough child’s drawing that used sketchy circles to shape faces and eyes. It depicted both of her parents, with a young Aqua standing in between them. Her mother was the one who had the blue hair. Next to that drawing was another childish scrawl, showing Eraqus standing in the middle, with a young Terra and Aqua at both of his sides.

Would that cub lose its only family?

She slumped onto her desk. It was really her that deserved this punishment anyway. But now she couldn’t speak to Terra for what seemed like weeks. If only she had spoken before he did.

She heard a rustling noise. Some tarp was being pushed through the crack under her door. She didn’t say anything. Not even a whisper. But it was Terra. And she knew exactly what the tarp had hidden.

The white leather journal they used to share as kids. They always wrapped it in tarp to keep it protected. It had embedded gold designs that graced both covers and the spine. It was dainty and sophisticated. From the first look, no one would have suspected it was something two children used to dawdle with. It had been a while since they have written anything into it, but it gave her nothing but pleasant memories.

The first few pages were filled with the uneven handwriting of a nine- and eight-year-old. Oaths. Fake essays where they elaborated on theories of who the god of light and the god of darkness were. Drawings that designed those same gods. They used to play pretend over these same characters. Written rules of games they used to make up. Lines that Terra copied from his favorite book about Robin Hood. She skimmed through the recipes they created together. One was supposed to be a delicious cookie recipe that her mother used to bake, and she wrote it from memory. Terra tried to make it himself, but forgot the eggs. And it wasn’t pleasant. Most of the other recipes were invented by him, and some were outright disgusting. Like trout cupcakes. Then there were photos they glued onto the pages. They had taken the Master’s polaroid camera, and took pictures of each other doing the dumbest faces under a pillow fort. One in particular had Terra pulling the edges of his mouth and sticking his tongue out. The pages afterward had written passages of the wishes they made for when they finally became Keyblade Masters.

Aqua came across the last entry with Terra’s writing. Folded in between were three pages of the essay he had already written. In the journal, he wrote.

 _Here’s a list of some books that will help you out. I left them stacked on a table in the library._  
How to Conjure a Keyblade  
Light and Darkness: The Nature of Duality  
How Animals Relate to Our World  
The Concept of Death  
Theory of Starlight  
Darkness and Its Effects: How to Count Shadows  
Trapping Light in a Bottle: Basic Theories on How Light Shines in Each of Us  
An Extension of the Heart: What a Keyblade is Meant to Do

_I’m sorry I made everything worse._

_P.S. Leave this journal back at the spot._

The spot. It was where this journal normally was kept. They picked it out together when they were allowed to explore the castle grounds and surrounding areas.

She picked up a quill that laid on her desk, dipped it into ink, and wrote with neat, cursive handwriting:

_I’m sorry, too. I shouldn’t have told the Master anything._

Outside her bedroom door, the hallway was dark. Several paces away from her, Terra’s door was closed. Light shown under his crack. It was not a good time to knock on it, so she silently walked, out toward the entrance to the castle. Down the terrace steps, across the field. Through some trees until she came across a clearing. Until some of the larger rocks sloped downward on a slant. Following this slant was a very short cliffside, where a small grassy area awaited her. Trees outlined the spring there, where a creek peeked out and slipped into the forest. This was the spot. This was the one place where Eraqus gave them complete privacy. Where they could talk about whatever they wanted. Their favorite place to spar. Arguments weren’t allowed here, but camping was. Often they had fallen asleep under the stars. This spot was theirs, and theirs alone.

Underneath the cliff, a there was an opening, where a chest sat waiting. Inside were old toys that they didn’t want cluttered in their room – but that they didn’t want to let go of, either. There was also a small, wooden box. She had completely forgotten that it was there. When she was eleven, Terra took her on a tour of some of the farther rivers and caves. This box was full of different crystals they found either washed in the dirt, or wedged into mountain rock. There were so many of them, they had spent hours picking out the best ones.

She wrapped the journal back in its tarp, and traded its place with the wooden box of crystals, before heading back to bed.

 

* * *

 

All by herself, the castle was very quiet. Birds flew by the windows. Clouds slowly leisured along. When she was bored of reading and writing, she would stare at some of the stained glass, noticing the patterns that she took for granted. Whoever crafted them was a genius.

When she was bored of staring at such innocuous details, she went to work. Sometimes, that was doing a chore – dusting wardrobes with spaces they haven’t cleared out in months. She mopped the floors and scrubbed so hard that they shone. Seven floors were a lot, but she had a lot of time. Sometimes, work was practicing her pirouettes and backflips. Music was the best distraction, but it could only last for so many hours at a time. She cooked meals for one. When she needed a perk-up, she sat in her room and worked on her macramé.

The goal was to make a lovely one for Terra, with some interesting knots. It would hang from a sanded log, and cast a gentle drape. But better than a traditional knitted design, she figured she could weave the crystals into her project. So that when she told Terra which wall to hang it up on, the crystals would reflect the sunlight that shone in his room every morning in different colors. She expected him to chuckle when she would command where her gift would go – after all, he normally just eased back and followed whatever she wanted, anyway. At times, she wondered if he preferred it that way.

She wasn’t an expert at crafting this – her mother was. She remembered the weekend mornings when she woke up to the smell of pie in the oven, and her mother working on macramé in the living room. It was her mother’s philosophy to make a gift by hand. Always. It was the best way to show someone her gratitude and care. Aqua messed up often, and would have to redo many of the knots. Hours would go by and she wasn’t able to finish one row. Maybe she was being too ambitious, but whatever. Terra deserved something really nice.

The next day was cloudy, but bright. She sat on the terrace steps outside the castle entrance, feeling the wind gently blow through her hair. It was lonely, but the rustling of the leaves helped to ease the pain.

Until there was a blip in the sky. It looked like a flying teddy bear. _A bear?_

It really did look like a teddy bear. It was round and plump, very much like the kind a kid would sleep with. Instead of a snout, a large, flat, pink nose wiggled like a rabbit’s. Small bat wings flapped on its back. And hovering above its head and mouse-ears, was a large, red, fluffy ball.

“Kupo?” it said as it landed next to her. In its small claws was the journal in its tarp.

“Terra sent you?” She was quick to take the notebook, her heart beating as she felt its stiffness in between her hands.

“Kupo!” Its voice was nasal, and high-pitched. It also whistled, but she couldn’t understand what it meant.

She hurriedly unwrapped the tarp, almost letting it rip, and sped through the pages until she got to the last entry.

_This is Mog. He’s a Moogle. The Master took me to a different world first where he bought some tonics and tranquilizers. That’s where I met Mog. It was really annoying trying to interact with him without the Master knowing. He just won’t let his eyes off me. I get that he’s mad, but he’s treating me like a criminal._

_Anyway, I figured you were lonely. I paid Mog to keep you company. He really likes carrots. I guess by the time you read this, we’ll be back with Denahi, taking care of the bear._

“It’s so nice to meet you, Mog,” Aqua said.

“Kupo!”

“Is that all you can say?” He was so _damn cute_ , and Aqua felt herself cheeks hurting from the smile. She reached over to pet the fluffy red ball, and Mog’s wings flapped furiously as he waved his stubby arms in circles.

“Don’t touch my pom-pom, kupo!”

She shuffled away from his frantic plea, and apologized. She continued reading Terra’s message:

_P.S. Mog doesn’t like it when you touch his pom-pom._

Fair enough. She invited Mog inside, where she gave him carrots. He ate like a rabbit, where his circular chews gradually sucked in the entire root. Mog followed her around the castle, watching her do chores. He would prance around the library as she wrote her essay. He hopped alongside when she danced. When she worked on her macramé, he bounced on the bed. He especially liked taking hikes with her, waddling around as he sniffed the surrounding bushes. She carried with her a sack of carrots that she periodically gave to him throughout the day

Talking to him wasn’t like talking to herself. Mog never replied with anything but _Kupo!_ But at least it made her feel like someone was listening. She learned to tell the difference between an inquisitive reply and an interested one. He was especially interested in how precious her macramé project was to her, and how perfect she wanted it to be.

Mog would sleep at the edge of her bed. Before it was time to retire for the night, Aqua would either talk to him about the stars outside her window, or about the book she was reading for fun. For now, she was reading a fantasy romance where the prince fought evil monsters and rescued the princess with true love’s first kiss. This wasn’t the first one of its kind she had read. In all of them, _true love_ and the meaning of the _kiss_ were never defined. They were concepts that were treated as is.

Terra came to her mind. “I wonder if true love is different between a best friend and a lover,” she said out loud.

“Kupo?”

“Well, I think true love is when you are willing to do anything and go any distance for another person. I know that is _definitely_ what Terra and I have.  But I wonder about finding true love with someone that I want to be with in a romantic way, like what my parents had. Would I recognize it as such? Is it like a lightning flash, and I just know right away?”

“Kupo…” His voice wavered a bit, as if he didn’t know either.

“I often get the impression from books like these that a first kiss is really special if it comes from such a bond. My mom had hers with my dad.”

“Kupo!” He sounded like he was in agreement, but she wasn’t sure.

“Maybe I’ll know it when I finally get to experience it.” She placed the book down on her bedside table, and turned off her lamp.  She chuckled as she crawled under her bed sheets. “Terra doesn’t think it’s that easy. But what does he know? He doesn’t even think these books can teach anything of value. Let’s see if he thinks the same way when he finds someone special.”

Mog waddled over to his corner of the bed. “Kupo.”

Aqua rested her head on her pillow, looking up at her ceiling. She liked to leave her curtains open, so she could look at the stars as she fell asleep. But something in her chest hurt. The last statement she made, about Terra finding someone else – it didn’t feel good. And she felt like she would be an awful best friend if that were the case. She brushed the thought aside. Looking forward to finding love should be exciting, and Terra would want her to find it, too. She closed her eyes until she woke the next day, continuing a schedule of completing chores, writing, and continuing her creative project.

Until the day she ran out of carrots. He ate broccoli, squash, tomatoes – so long as it wasn’t meat, he was fine with it. He even enjoyed cupcakes. But over time, Mog got restless. Perhaps he was bored – it was hard to tell, because he never _said_ anything. She wasn’t allowed to leave the Land of Departure to get more carrots, either.

So Mog busied himself with destruction. Broken vases, overturned and shredded books, wailing down the hallways. What was worse was when he dragged mud into the castle, or found old, dusty artifacts from the attic that he spread around. He even ate some of the flowers planted in gardens behind the castle. Yelling at him did nothing, so she had to improvise.

The first thing that Aqua did was search Eraqus’ office for his polaroid camera. She took photos of the damage, making sure Mog was at the center of them. Then she scavenged the library for the same books that she used to cover up for Terra. Books with simple house spells to fix almost anything. Broken vases were fixed with her chants. Torn pages were mended together, with no trace of their demise. She had to pick up after his dirty messes, but at least it was something to do. There was no book that allowed her to revive dead flowers, or conjure ones in their place. She moaned when she realized there was no way to hide this from the Master, and figured Terra will help her with that one later.

That night, she walked into her room and froze when she saw Mog rummaging through her dresser.

Thankfully, he did not touch her project.

She sat on her desk and glued the polaroid shots onto the journal, and wrote:

_Thanks for sending Mog. He was great until I ran out of carrots. But I can’t say I ever got bored with him. How long will it be until you get back?_

She wrapped the journal in its tarp and opened her bedroom window. She asked Mog to deliver it back to Terra.

“I need payment for delivery, kupo,” he replied.

“ _Now_ you talk?” Aqua couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re so cynical.”

She opened a small drawer on her desk, where she kept an embroidered pouch with her allowance, and paid him. A small part of her was a bit relieved to see him go, but the silence that followed after made her regret the decision.

At least she had more time to focus on her essay. She had been slacking in looking after Mog all this time. That was what she told herself every time she remembered that she was alone again. She would focus on the beautiful details of the castle, the gold overlays that framed the walls in the entire academy. The delicate velvet of all the chairs. The number of writers that wrote all the books in the library. Anything to feel gratitude and get rid of this empty feeling.

Mog came back soon enough, hovering outside the library window. Aqua ran to him, happy to see him again, but ecstatic at seeing the journal. Along with a sack of carrots.

She whipped through the pages. He wrote:

_I actually think that’s hilarious. Glad to see Mog is useful. I went ahead and got some carrots for you. We’ve kept the bear tranquilized this entire time. I’ve been feeding the cub, and the villagers were concerned about him being domesticated. It was hard for the Master to heal her wounds. But she recovered just fine. Her fur won’t grow back in those calloused areas, but she’s okay._

_I don’t know how long it will take. The Master wants to take me somewhere else, to teach me a lesson, I guess. I wish you were here with us. Denahi knows you didn’t mean to harm the bear, so why does it have to be this way?_

_P.S. I’ll get you more carrots anytime._

Alongside the message was a photo of him cradling the cub. It had its paw up against his face, and he was smiling down at it. There was another of the mother bear, asleep, on a makeshift cot as the villagers surrounded her. Eraqus knelt in front of her, his hand on her wounds. Denahi stood behind him.

Aqua breathed a heavy sigh of relief. The mother bear was alright. The cub will survive in an unforgivable world.

She reread his message several times. He wrote “ _why does it have to be this way?_ ” She felt the same, but something about this exact sentence made her heart skip a beat. She wrote back:

_I miss you. I wish I was there, too._

Then she stopped. She wasn’t even sure what she was trying to say. How desperate and needy she was that his messages make her day? No, that wasn’t enough. 

In the kitchen, Aqua prepared butter, salt, just a dash of sugar (small enough to be undetected), and syrup. And a whole mess of peanuts. Nuts were one of Terra’s favorite snacks, so she mixed these ingredients together and left them in a hot oven. Then she took almonds, and dipped them into a mug of vinegar, and then sprinkled them with salt. Salted almonds and peanut brittle.

She added a message of _I hope you like these! We’ll see each other soon_ into the journal before handing it back to Mog, along two bags filled with these treats.

“I need more payment for heavier deliveries, kupo,” Mog said. Plus two carrots.

She made more progress through her project, learning to weave together the knots around the crystals more efficiently until she was almost done by the time Mog came back.

The journal felt thicker this time, and wedged in between the pages of Terra’s latest entry was a necklace. It used rope to keep it together, and the pendant was a carving out of some gorgeous turquoise stone, shaped like a mermaid.

On one of the pages was a photo of a city in a world that looked like it was made of water. At the center sat a large castle, and the houses that surround it were all situated on rivers. The entire area looked like it stood atop a huge lake, where a fort kept it up, allowing its dams to let these beautiful waterfalls fall out into an ocean.

By this photo, Terra wrote:

_You’re the best for sending me these! They were delicious. It’s so hard hiding Mog from the Master, and there were a couple of times I almost got caught. Of course you miss me. The castle must be so lame without me around. I do really need to spar though. I think we’ll both be rusty by the time this is all over._

_This is Atlantis. The people here are aware of the heart of their world, and depend on it for their technology and protection. I honestly never thought I would ever come across such a thing. The city is well hidden, too. The people above the ocean have no clue that light is being utilized this way. It’s interesting to see how well the Atlanteans are willing to take care of themselves and take on such a responsibility. Especially since none of them are Keybearers._

_I know the Master took me here so that I can witness them and learn about their theories of light, and their history of depending on the heart of their world. I just wish I could be more open with him. I feel like I can’t talk to him about what happened without getting a huge lecture that I don’t need. But I also can’t have him think that I’m rejecting this lesson – what if it affects my path to becoming a Keyblade Master?_

_Anyway, I asked one of the artisans to craft that necklace. I only described you to him, and he said he made it in your image. I hope you like it._

_P.S. One of these days, when we’re both old enough to go out on our own, we should come to Atlantis. Just you and me._

The necklace was truly beautiful. And special, coming from a such a secret place. It made her beam to look at it, and she reread his message several times again. She imagined him smiling when he noticed the treats as he sat in some fancy foreign room like he was some guest in a palace. She imagined him talking with the artisan, nodding as he described what he apparently thought was a mermaid. _She was a mermaid to him, now?_ She hung the necklace on the bedpost at the head of her bed, but couldn’t come up with a message to write back. Not just yet, anyway.

She rationed the carrots more efficiently in order to keep Mog behaving. But she focused most of her attention on the macramé, making sure the loops are all of the same size so it wasn’t sloppy. Until it was finally done. Her back ached a little when she stood up to inspect its completion. Then she realized she wasn’t done with it, because it was longer on one side. Which meant she had to do the entirety of the affected rows again.

It took another day for her to complete it with perfection. The polaroid camera in her hand, Aqua debated whether she should send Terra a photo of it, or wait to surprise him when he came back.

He would be surprised with it anyway, so she snapped a shot of it.

On the page next to the glued photo, she wrote:

_Thank you for the necklace. I absolutely adore it._

_The Master can be very strict at times, but he’s right. I shouldn’t have attacked the bear. I can’t be a Keyblade Master if I can’t stop myself from accidently harming others. I should have served the punishment to begin with. I’m so happy that we are sending messages to each other. But I worry that we aren’t learning the lesson we should be. We are supposed to become Keyblade Masters together. I don’t want to ruin that, and I know you don’t either. But it’s hard. I don’t understand what’s so wrong about this, and yet I want to understand what the Master is trying to teach us._

_Going to Atlantis sounds like a deal. I made you this. My mom used to build these things and decorate our house with them. Recognize those crystals? You need to hang on it on the wall next to your mirror, so the sun will catch them. I really hope you like it, too._

And off Mog went with her payment.

Aqua was sitting in the library, on a clear day, scratching her quill away on the paper in front of her with three open books, when she heard the sound of footsteps. Eraqus appeared in front of her, quietly taking a seat across.

She sat up straight and folded her fingers on the table. “Welcome home, Master,” she said. She almost sounded adult to herself. It was a strange feeling, juggling between feeling happy that she has someone to talk to, and feeling dread at what was coming.

Eraqus nodded and folded his own hands. “How has your time in the castle been?”

“I’ve kept myself busy.”

The Master nodded solemnly. “I understand that you meant no harm to the bear, and I have faith that you realize why it is so dangerous to wield your magic so recklessly.”

“I do, Master.” She nodded quickly. If he could understand that she knew she did wrong the moment the bear ran off…

He took a long breath, and she got the impression that he was looking through her, toward somewhere else. “You need to understand, Aqua, the importance of supporting your partner. Wielding a Keyblade gives a person so much power and control. It can possess a person to commit horrible acts. You know the importance of keeping darkness from taking control. I want to see you and Terra succeed where I have failed.”

“Master?”

Eraqus cast his gaze to somewhere on the table, into a place that didn’t exist. “I’ve lost a dear friend, my own partner, to the madness. I don’t believe I’ve done a decent enough job in taking care of him. I tried to be there when he needed me most, yet it wasn’t enough. It’s a heartbreaking experience, and I do not think I would be able to cope if your bond with Terra shattered because of lack of guidance.”

Aqua had nothing to say. Hearing something like this was surprising. The Master was incredibly private about his youth. She knew there was one other student that studied alongside him, but Eraqus never spoke of it. She didn’t even know what this student looked like, because Eraqus never flaunted any photos from that age.

“Never mind an old man’s musings. How far along in your thesis are you?” he asked, breaking her train of thought.

“Sixteen pages.”

The Master chuckled. “Well, that’s quite enough of a long essay that I will have to read. I wanted to apologize to you, Aqua, for speaking to you in the tone that I did. I think you did enough.”

Aqua gripped her fingers tightly so as not to cry. “Thank you so much, Master. I really appreciate it.”

Eraqus placed his hand on hers and gently squeezed it. “Terra is outside by the training grounds. I’ve asked him to give us some privacy first, so he took it upon himself to train,” he said as he stood up. “By the way, I’ve noticed some of the flower beds looking empty. Were there rabbits?”

She swallowed. “Yes, sir. A colony of them.”

He smiled to himself. “Nothing like giving back to nature. I suppose it’s time for me to plant more seeds.”

It was when the Master left that Aqua felt her heart pounding. A smile broadened across her face, and she laughed silently. She ran out of the library, but stopped short. First, her bedroom. She grabbed the mermaid necklace and wore it around her neck, checking her mirror to make sure it was in the right place. She eyed the macramé, but it was too big to take outside. Her gaze glanced at the children’s drawings, and she opened a dresser drawer full of her softest pajamas. Under a stack of them was yet another child’s art piece that she placed here so that the softness of the fabric would keep it protected. Her and Terra, under a black sky full of yellow stars.

She ran out of the castle, and there he was, whacking away at the contraptions built for their training with his large Earthshaker.

He heard her approach him first. “The necklace looks great on you,” he said, with a smile. A smaller grin than what was usual in the years before, but it was his. His own Terra-like expression of happy.

She threw herself on him, wrapping her arms around his neck. What never changed was his warmth. It never ceased to amaze her how he just couldn’t get cold, and she nearly cried as he wrapped his arms around her back. But no. She wouldn’t cry. This wasn’t an appropriate time to do so.

“What did you think of the piece I built for you?” she asked as she let go.

Terra bent over to pick up the tarp from the ground by him. “I wrote about in the journal, but I ran out of munny to send Mog back. I had to pay him a fee just to leave me alone. But it was great. I… I loved it. I can’t believe you did that for me.”

“It was no trouble at all. Really. I had a lot of fun messing with it.” Aqua took the tarp-wrapped notebook in her other hand, and gestured her head to the side. “You want to spar?”

“You don’t have to ask.”

The sun would cast its light on the trees in such a way that the spot was almost always shaded. The tension in Terra’s shoulders relaxed. This was their place where they could be unapologetically themselves. She had expected him to immediately summon his Keyblade and pester her to do the same right away, so they could get right into it. But he didn’t.

She waved the child’s drawing in his face. “Do you remember when you made me this?”

Terra’s brows raised when he saw it. He remembered alright, but his refusal to answer told her he was embarrassed. She hovered it close to him for just a moment, waiting for him to strike. He shot his hand out, but she evaded, keeping the drawing away from him. “Too slow,” she said.

“I can’t believe you kept that,” he said.

“I think it should go inside the journal. Fold it neatly in the back.”

“I think it’s a good idea.” His voice trailed off. “Aqua, there was something I wanted to say first.”

“You know you can talk freely here,” she said as she unwrapped the journal.

“The Master would have made you sit in the castle all alone writing that stupid essay anyway. Forcing us not to speak was just excessive.” He rubbed his arm. “I guess what I’m trying to say is that I feel bad that the punishment got worse. I know you wrote to me saying that we needed to learn a lesson, but… I don’t feel guilty about sending you these messages at all.”

Aqua snorted and hit him across the arm. “You’re so bad.” He laughed as well and shrugged. She opened the journal and turned the pages until she reached the last written account, but kept herself from reading. “Has the Master ever talked to you about his time as a student?”

“You know he’d never answer any questions about that stuff,” Terra said. Then his eyes got wide with excitement. “But listen to this. I overhead him talking to Denahi. They were laughing about when they met. Apparently, the spirits turned Denahi’s brother, Kenai, into a bear in order to teach him a lesson about death, life, and acceptance. Kenai actually chose to stay that way.

“You’re kidding.”

“That’s not the crazy part. The Master was there on a mission with his friend – you know, the one he studied with.” Terra laughed for a moment before continuing. “This friend, I didn’t catch his name – Denahi thought he was pretty funny, but he had a serious temper. The spirits didn’t take too kindly with him, and thought he needed to learn patience.”

He continued to laugh, which made Aqua stomp her foot. “So then what happened?”

Terra wiped his eyes. “In order to teach him, the spirits turned _the Master_ into a chipmunk that the friend would have to watch over.”

“No way.” She giggled, imaging a chipmunk-version of Eraqus sitting atop the shoulder of whoever this mysterious person was. Weirder still was imagining the Master, who was such a serious person, going on such a crazy adventure.

“Makes you wonder what kind of interesting stories he refuses to tell us,” Terra said, catching his breath.

She looked down at the leather journal, its pages open to Terra’s last entry, which was short. “I wonder if he has a diary of such things. There has to be a photo album somewhere.”

“I don’t think I want to piss him off more than we already have.”

“I’m glad we have a record of something,” she said, tracing her fingers along his scratchy handwriting.

_It’s beautiful, Aqua. It must have taken you days to make it. I haven’t seen those crystals in forever! I think it makes it look even better. Thank you. I’ll hang it up wherever you want to me to put it._

_I know exactly what you mean. But I think we will be okay. The Master always said that it’s important to watch out for each other. That’s what I felt I was doing when I lied. I don’t ever want to regret doing that. You’re usually better at understanding some of his more obscure lessons than I am. I know you’ll look out for me too._

_That’s why we’ll always be best friends._

_P.S. I’m broke. Do you mind sending me some of my allowance next time you send Mog? I keep it in the second dresser on my desk._

It was calling her work beautiful, a word she never heard him use. And that he said they would always be close. Aqua felt her heart beat hard, and she had the urge to cry a little. She didn’t understand why, exactly, but she kept herself from doing so.

She looked up into his deep blue eyes. There was a gentle smile on his face, and she figured that if Terra wanted to smile this way from now on, she would prefer it over his old one. And what exactly did that feel like? She didn’t have the word to describe it, and it was too much.

She leaned forward to meet his lips with hers, feeling that he puckered with her. It was short and sweet, her first kiss. But she liked it. He was warm, and smelled of the sandalwood he showered with, along with the natural nutty aroma that always graced his skin. 

He was close enough to see herself reflected off such a dark blue. To see his long, wispy eyelashes. Terra breathed sporadically, and attempted to contain a smile. He laughed nervously and scattered his eyes around.

“What was that for?” he asked. He grabbed his forearm and tightened his grip around his wrist.

“I… don’t know? We’re best friends, and I thought you were showing me so much…” She faltered, unsure of what she was trying to say.

Terra stared hard at her with wide eyes and a smile frozen in surprise, letting out his breaths in anxious bursts. Rubbing his arm and turning away from her, he said, “you’re such a dork, Aqua.”

“Why?” She began to follow him.

“No, don’t follow me,” he waved his arm around, laughing through his breaths.

“You don’t want to spar anymore?”

He was walking up the slope that harbored the cliff side hiding the chest, not removing his grip on his wrist. “Nah, not now. Maybe later.”

She sighed, exasperated. She flipped the pages to the end of the journal, where she carefully folded his drawing into the book. She thought about the story her mother told her, of when her father kissed for her the first time at the county fair. And how happy it made the both of them. How hard it was for her mother to keep herself from squealing with excitement. This was definitely not the same sentiment. It was a first kiss spent on something she misunderstood. At least it was with Terra, who wouldn’t judge her for it. And he would still be her best friend, regardless.

Wrapped in its tarp, Aqua gently placed their journal back into the chest. For the next time they needed it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **This chapter references Brother Bear (2003) and Atlantis: the Lost Empire (2001)**.
> 
> Author’s Note: Thank you so much for reading!!! Here is the long backstory of this fic.
> 
> -This started as a flashback scene meant to be wedged into the second half of my longfic, based on the Terraqua Day headcanon I created as mentioned above. The origin of this was actually listening to the Nightmare Before Christmas soundtrack. One of my favorite pieces was the one covering Sally’s jump out of her window to deliver Jack a goody basket she put together. Hearing both of their motifs (and hearing that flute and tuba crescendo!) just melts me. So even though there is no Halloween to be found here, this would have never existed without Danny Elfman’s “Jack and Sally Montage.”
> 
> -Now, the flashback scene was supposed to cover Aqua’s punishment, and Terra was supposed to use a pulley to bring down a basket to her bedroom, full of his baked creations, along with the journal and a recipe he wrote down. She was supposed to hate it, and write back to him that it was awful. Which would have amused him, because he expected as much. But the flashback just didn’t do it justice like I wanted.
> 
> -That was when the switch happened. The story that was supposed to go here wasn’t fluffy enough (hint: it has something to do with Fantasia). I added the bear attack, which was supposed to take place completely in the LoD, and the first kiss at the end. Everything else, including him using the pulley. The main problem with this second draft was that the pulley scene read very ugly. I just couldnt’ fix it. The draft also didn’t have the magic or parallelism or symbolism I was needing to call my work mine.
> 
> -Eventually, I finally watched Brother Bear for the first time (what a cryfest and a laughfest all at once, right?). So then the bear attack happened in that world. This third draft had Terra and Eraqus traveling back and forth in between the LoD and that world. Terra was supposed to be leaving the journal in all sorts of places in the castle so they could continue talking. I had this one scene that I adored where Eraqus allowed them to study in the same room together. Terra was supposed to be that rebellious teenager throwing crumpled pieces of paper to her. She was supposed to be Hermione-like, and tried to mimic some actions in order to get him to stay quiet. But I hated the back and forth. It didn’t flow well at all. I really hated to delete this scene, but the overall story just didn’t work anymore. It now sits in a pile of deleted scenes. Maybe it will find a home somewhere else.
> 
> -What you read was the fourth draft, where using the Moogle saved me from calling it quits. How long did this process take me? FOUR MONTHS. Sometimes that happens. Sometimes you just have to beat the shit out of a story until it can finally work. I’m really happy that it’s finally out and done! I never thought I’d see the day.


	6. Volume VI: A Tale of Landslides, Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Mark of Mastery is almost here. Nineteen-year-old Terra and eighteen-year-old Aqua have one last mission to complete before they they are evaluated for all the efforts they put into being Keyblade Masters. If only they had mastery over their own flourishing emotions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is based off of @holyteapotofrussell‘s prompt, “It’s three in the morning.” It’s been a long, long, LONG time since I updated this fic, and mostly because I just wasn’t happy with it. From that prompt, I imagined the two of them getting out of a fresh fight, and so that prompt won’t be fulfilled until the third (and final installment) of this specific story. But of course, setting the stage up for a proper fight turned this story into a much bigger story than I had anticipated. And no one likes to read their OTP fighting (even though it’s perfectly natural and realistic for them to? Like, they're human?). I did really need all of this time to fix what was wrong with it, though. It really challenged my ability to convey them, as well.
> 
> This chapter is named after Fleetwood Mac’s “Landslide.”

If Terra hoped to get a decent night’s sleep, the morning sun reminded him that he hoped for nothing. He spent too many hours replaying last night in his mind, and he lost himself in remembering how soft her lips felt before he finally let his dreams take over. Waking up left him in a near panic.

Soon enough, he’d have to talk to her. She was drunk when she leaned forward and kissed him, after all.

But if it went well, he’d have a chance at another one. Desire at this point would be an understatement, it was almost a need.

Even without enough sleep, he leaped off his bunk and quickly washed up. Some of the other stable men were still in bed, but he couldn’t imagine that they slept very soundly, what with all the chatter over the Highland games, the archery competition for Merida’s hand in marriage, happening today. But his stomach did somersaults, and he couldn’t ingest any breakfast.

Tents and archery posts were fully set up by the time the sun had fully risen. It was a sunny day, but with the territory situated so high on the mountains, it was cool and breezy. Terra was allowed to keep his fur, and he chose to fold it and hang it off his green kilt. Crowds of people, both native and from the other clans, huddled together to watch the suitors line up to take their shots. The royal family members sat on their thrones under the shade of their own canvas, flags with their insignia waving in the wind.

Aqua stood near them, wearing her brown maid’s dress again, with white cotton bell sleeves. She massaged her temples from the headache that he had no doubt came from an inevitable hangover. Merida, fidgeting in her throne, leaned over to talk to her, and Aqua quickly flashed a smile and nodded, hiding her annoyance and discomfort. It looked like she was trying to encourage the princess about something. The moment Merida was pleased with her answer, Aqua stopped saving face and went back to grimacing.

He shook his leg in anticipation. He couldn’t go near her, for his place was within the gossiping crowd, safely away from the royal family and the suitors. He wondered if he should wave to catch her attention. But if he did, he might attract the gaze of the men around him, looking to sneer at whatever he was doing. It was better that they sort this out in the secret passage within the castle, where they could have some privacy.

The competition began. The suitors took their shots, and it didn’t take long before the son of Lord Dingwall was announced as Merida’s future husband. Enlarged nose, pale, buck teeth, scrawny. But worst of all, he was lost in his head so much that he barely registered that he won. Not very suitable to be a considerate spouse to someone else.

Except that Merida had something to say about that. She proceeded to compete for her own hand, and it didn’t surprise him to see see that Aqua kept calm in spite of this announcement. She watched the princess intently, her hand to her heart as if anticipating something. But Merida strode with confidence, disqualifying every single suitor with her expertise, outperforming them so much that their shots seemed feeble and pathetic. The queen however, challenged her daughter, and this resulted in a public blowout between them.

Chaos ensued afterward. The crowds broke off, each clan segregating from each other. The lords were furious, threatening to harm diplomatic relations with the king for such offense. The queen, furious, dragged Merida away, a concerned Aqua following close behind them. The king, helpless, wandered around with no idea over how to handle anything that was going on, sputtering incoherent words which were his best defense at preventing a war. It was too crazy for anyone to notice was Terra was doing, so he slipped away to wait in the secret passage.

He waited at bottom of the stairs that led into the royal ward, where he whistled three short times for her cue. She didn’t whistle back. He paced back and forth. He whistled again.

“Terra!”

She ran down to him, her dress dragging on the steps behind her. Her hair bounced, her eyes were bright like the sky. Her lips were pink. In truth, she didn’t look like she slept very well either, what with the heavy bags under her eyes. And yet, she looked prettier. He reached out, holding her elbow and leaning toward her more than what was causal. She didn’t necessarily welcome it - in fact, she didn’t notice it at all, and gripped his shirt in a pleading way.

“I need to stay and distract the queen,” she said, her breath heavy and her forehead wrinkled with worry. “Merida ran away. You’ve got to find her!”  

_Right, we’re on a mission. I should focus._

“Don’t worry, I’ll get her.” Terra nodded as he kept his voice serious.

Aqua’s sigh was shaky and she breathed it out, meditating for a moment to keep herself calm. This mission suddenly went south very swiftly, and too close to the Mark of Mastery exam.

“Thanks, Terra.” She squeezed his forearm in appreciation before she let go, and ran back up the stairs.

Terra sprinted outside, ducking into the thicket of the forest so that no one would see him summon his glider. He assumed that Merida would take her horse and ride down the main road leading away from the castle, which stretched a distance he did not know, through branches and large trunks of trees so tall that their canopies blocked the sun.

This instinct was right.

Merida, seemingly fallen off her horse, was distressed as she pat her steed. Her fiery curly hair swayed freely, and her dress was ripped. But more important than these details was the fact that her beloved bow wasn’t with her. She turned to face him as he approached her, and she placed her foot on the stirrup as though she was trying to run away from him.

“You won’t be taking me back there,” she said.

“Relax. I’m not here to force you to go anywhere.” He held up his arms in surrender.

Her foot slowly found its way back to the ground. “Where is Aqua?” she demanded, her heavy accent adding a vowel to the name.

“She’s with your mother.” He cleared his throat. The queen was probably not the best subject of conversation to have right now. “You were amazing, by the way. I was very impressed with your skill with the bow and arrow.”

Merida hugged herself, flashes of fury and despair passing through her face. “I was only trying to control my future. My mum doesn’t understand. I didn’t want to be forced to...” She held a gasp.

“If it’s worth anything,” he said, keeping his voice sweet and understanding, “you have a strong heart, and it knows what is best for you. You should rely on it.”

She cocked her head, confused by his disposition. “My dad’s right, you know. You’re a real softie for a man.” 

It was aggravating, having to constantly deal with the assumptions over his character, and never living up to their stupid expectations. Especially when he considered that _for a softie_ , he could easily flip her over his shoulder and carry her all the way home.

Pushing his annoyance to the back of his mind, he asked, “what are you going to do now, your Highness?”

“Well stay in the forest, o’course.”

“Forever?” He tried to sound teasing. Playful. Less of a threat and more of a friend. It didn’t cheer her up. “Why don’t you join me, then? It helps me to take walks when I’m upset about something. The mountains are healing that way.”

Merida did join him. She led her horse as he walked by her side. They talked about her wishes for the future. She was barely older than Ventus, and she didn’t have any defined expectations about her life yet. But she didn’t want anything to be done on her behalf. She wished that her mother didn’t try to control her every move, every single day, or decide what her future was going to entail. Terra sympathized. She was far too young to get married off to someone. Unfortunately for her, he had no say.

The tone of the conversation changed when she caught sight of something ahead of them. A dancing ball of blue light with the barest of facial features, humming as if beckoning them to come closer. It was, at least, a gentle spirit, playful but gentle. There wasn’t a shred of threat that he could sense from it.

“A wisp,” Merida said excitedly as she hurried to get closer.

“A what?”

“A will o’ the wisp! Faeries. I’ve seen them before and I’ve been waiting for them to come back. They lead you to your destiny.” For once, Merida actually smiled.

Terra approached the wisp and held out his hand. The light emanating from it was warm, and for a second, it bobbed in place and floated back toward his palm. Like it appreciated the attention. It then hovered away, only to stop as though it was waiting for them to follow. Terra wasn’t one to believe that destiny was written out for any one person. It took work and dedication, with each person aiming to actively make something out of their lives. But this mission wasn’t about him.

 _Fates changing for her,_ was what the Master had said when he sent them off to this mission.

“We should follow it,” Merida said, already paces ahead of him.

Some part of him hesitated still, as if he knew it was going to get complicated. But if her fate should change, then who was he to judge the rules of this world? “We should.”

The wisp led to them to a solitary cottage, owned by a witch who was apparently - _strangely_ \- obsessed with bears. The entire house was adorned with probably a hundred wood carvings of them, some comical, some cute, some whimsical. Terra on some level wasn’t certain if asking for a witch’s advice was the best solution for a political struggle, having read plenty of books about the deception and cost of magic. Some witches had good intentions, but many acted high on their power to abuse. The witch agreed to concoct something for Merida to help with her situation - with enough badgering and bribery.

But Terra held out his hand to stop Merida from accepting a piece of cake that was laced with a brew from the witch.

“We are here to see how fate is going to change for you, not to poison the queen,” he said, mostly to Merida.

“Then why would the wisp bring us here?”

Considering he didn’t have such a close relationship with the princess, it seemed that it would be difficult to have her trust his advice. He also didn’t have much leverage against the wisp, which is such an omniscient being that was basically regarded like a god, however benevolent it seemed.

“I’m not sure, your Highness, but this isn’t even a diplomatic solution.”

“I suppose then you need _your_ mother to tell you what to do with your life. Tell you which opportunities to take and which to refuse? Wash your bum for you?” She huffed, flabbergasted that he didn’t understand the what a gift she was given. “For a man, you’ve less spine than a squirrel.”

It was clear that she didn’t respect his opinion, and that was mainly because he did nothing to earn it from her. With his concerns brushed aside, she took the cake, now itching to return to the castle. And desperate enough to ignore his ongoing pleas to reason with her, unsure of what the witch’s potion was going to do.

The castle wasn’t exactly a comfortable place to be. The king managed the fury of the lords with spectacular failure in an attempt to stall time - even trying his tired and overused story of how he lost his leg during a fight with the most ferocious bear that existed in this world. Mor’du, a monstrous creature that the people here feared, and the king boasted about his survival when confronting him. It was a story that Terra already heard at least five times during the incredibly short time he spent here.

He therefore avoided the throne room altogether. Merida left him behind, eager to find her mother and try the spell (and completely ignoring the commotion, in which the lords demanded her presence so she would pick a suitor). He crept up the secret passage, sneaking into the maid’s ward so that he could speak to Aqua. To warn her about the witch and the spell. To talk to her about the night before. He passed by a large bow that hung decoratively on the wall when he got to the top floor. He inspected it, trying to gauge if the princess was tall enough to wield it. He decided she was capable, and took it down so that he could give it to her as a gift of confidence.

But while sneaking around, he heard crashes and a scream.

He entered the queen’s room. Aqua was there, using herself as a barrier to protect a hysterical Merida from a bear in front of them, which was destroying some of the tapestries and the furniture around them.

Aqua turned to him when he entered, a confounded expression on her face as she hugged the princess.

“What did you do?” she asked, the sound of disbelief and anger cutting slices into him. 

* * *

The witch’s cottage was empty. Left behind was a note addressed to Merida, saying how they only had tonight and a day to turn the queen back into a human, or she’d be cursed to wander as a bear for the rest of her life. Her only counsel: to mend what was broken.

Aqua, understandably, was livid. A wreck, really. _The Master will probably not allow us to take the exam after this_ , she had said to Terra. Her tone was condescending. Worried. Angry. Terra knew she was probably feeling a mix of strong emotions, since he felt the same. But he kept his mouth shut. Better for them to stand together than split apart. They still had a day, so there was a chance to remedy this, even if Aqua could not make herself believe it right now.

Or perhaps he was too much in denial over what happened to accept that they were screwed.

The rain beat hard on them, and Terra used logs and twigs to build two small huts for them to take shelter in while Aqua tried to comfort Merida, who was still arguing with the bear, her mother, over the situation. The queen, still expressing human emotions even though she couldn’t talk, was also furious. Her rage was directed toward Merida, who outright _refused_ to accept any responsibility over what she did. Terra did his best to ignore them. Aqua must still blame him for everything, and he didn’t want to invite any more of her anger.

She had the unenviable job of explaining to the princess and the queen about the magic that they wield, about their powers of protection, about them coming here as guides and warriors. And she was very thorough about it, with everything except mentioning the word “Keyblade.” But it disappointed them both to learn that nothing can be done about the queen’s condition without following the witch’s instructions. 

None of their conversations ended with any grace, with the princess and the queen refusing to acknowledge each other as they tried to sleep in their hut.

The rain was cold, and the muddy ground was no comfort either. Terra finished the second shanty, and Aqua quickly sat down next to him to avoid the poor weather, her hands to her head. He wasn’t sure if she still had a headache or if she was still processing the disaster that had become their final mission before the most important exam of their lives.

“Aqua,” he said to break the silence, “I... Merida wouldn’t listen to me.”

“And now the queen is a _bear_.” As if he didn’t know this. Aqua held her gaze to the ground, as though looking at him would set her off in a rage. “And her husband is an obsessed, bear-hating idiot who’ll hunt her down.”

“Listen, I know it sounds crazy, but we came across these faeries that the people in this world believed were omens that changed fates. Just like the Master said may happen.”

“So you thought it was a good idea to listen to a _witch_? This isn’t one of your bedtime stories.”

“I actually didn’t want Merida to take the pie.” Terra stopped himself from raising his voice. This wasn’t how he wanted things to go, at all. He cleared his throat. “We still have time to fix this. We have one more full day, right? We won’t miss the exam if that’s what you’re worried about.” He softened his voice further, appealing to her worries. They could hang their heads in shame for failing the mission, and possibly have the exam cancelled on them, but they wouldn’t miss the date.

Aqua sighed sharply and held her hands together. “What if we can’t?”

“Thinking that way will do us no good.” He smiled. She usually was the one to give him the pep talk, but right now she needed to hear her own words.

She sighed slowly as she closed her eyes. “You’re right, I’m sorry.” she said, finally softening her voice. “I didn’t know what else to do when she was complaining about her situation. I told her that no matter what she decided to do, she was going to have to face consequences, and she had the bravery to survive them. It was something the Master would say, so what went wrong?”

“It went like it was supposed to, and now she has to learn to what it all means for her.” It didn’t comfort her. “You said the right thing. You do well with counseling others, you know.”

These words didn’t help her either. Aqua wrapped her arms around herself, feebly adjusting to get comfortable among the rocks around her. He loosened the fur on his hip and handed it to her. A peace offering.

“I’m not cold,” he said before she could object.

She reluctantly accepted it, but it wasn’t enough to cover her entirely. He could wrap his arms around her and keep her warm, and he ached to have her that close. But first he’d have to say something. And yet, what if she regretted what happened last night? Should he ask? Should he stay quiet?

He somehow convinced himself that having certainty was better than none. It was going to be an uncomfortable night anyway, and knowing he could give her the warmth and comfort she needed was agonizing when he couldn’t act on it.

“Aqua, I wanted to talk to you about last night,” he started, making sure that his voice wasn’t shaky.

“What is there to talk about?” An odd question, considering what happened.

He laughed nervously, although most of it was shock. “You... you don’t remember what happened?”

She scoffed. “Just that there was an obnoxious guy who wouldn’t leave me alone. Why? What was so important about last night?”

A kiss. It felt like a rock forcing a growth in the pit of his chest, the rain patter louder than his breath. He willed himself to stay calm.

“Nothing,” he said, though he didn’t know if he sounded convincing and was too weak to check himself. That rock sunk to the center of his stomach. “I just wanted to lighten the mood, that’s all.”

“Well, if it doesn’t help our situation, then right now is not the best time,” she said in a low voice. “I’d appreciate it if we could take this seriously.” She was tired. Anxious. Desperate for a miracle. “We should catch as much rest as possible.”

Moving away from her, Terra tried to get comfortable on his own, his arms crossed as he rubbed his own biceps, though he couldn’t stay dry. The two friends were as far away from each other as that small hut allowed them to be, their ankles crossing in front of each other. They were still close, and yet he felt completely alone. 

* * *

The morning left Aqua in a better mood, but it was only so much. Sleeping on the muddy ground left them both groggy, sore, and weary of the stress. So while she wasn’t in a constant state of agitation anymore, it didn’t mean that she handled their situation with grace and resilience.

In other words, Aqua relied on her habit of disagreeing with Terra on most of his suggestions when brainstorming ideas for helping their cursed queen.

He knew it wasn’t about her not trusting him. If anything, she needed him to be there with her. It was more about the fact that when Aqua became anxious or nervous, she liked to be in control, and it was easier to let her have it.

Aqua, though, handled Merida much better than he ever could. The princess took care of most of the hunting, while her mother, who had no idea how to be a proper bear, watched with admiration over how well her daughter can take care of herself. And Merida took these chances to brag about her skills, _just so_ her mother can understand that she wasn’t like any other princess and shouldn’t be expected to be behave as such.

Which meant that she still didn’t take responsibility over the whole ordeal. And they still bickered. A lot.

It was amazing how much patience Aqua offered the princess, who was sympathetic enough, but even then she was getting tested. Since she had the princess’ respect, it only took one stern word and Merida listened intently.

Terra hoped that if he had to escort any other princess in the future, it would go smoother.

The plan for now was...well they didn’t have much of one. Going back to the castle was completely out of the question, since everyone there was afraid of bears and the king would command a hunt. The only idea Aqua liked was to find some ancient runes to see if any of them had clues about witchcraft, a history of bears in this world, or most importantly, information about wisps.

And like fate, wisps appeared down a dirt road they were traversing, as if to respond to her curiosity. She wondered out loud if they were in league with the witch who created such a mess.

But with Merida’s insistence, the queen’s desperation to return to normal and Terra’s decision to agree with Merida, Aqua had no choice but to blindly follow.

The trek was mostly uphill, with several wisps lining up like a trail that led them up slopes. The view of the valleys and the castle in the horizon was beautiful, and for a moment, Terra was able to let his mind wander. Leaving his immediate fate at the hands of the wisps meant that he was free to think about other things. Like Aqua. The Mark of Mastery exam. Wishing things were back to normal. But most importantly of all, seeing this vast scenery was a reminder of how small he really was, despite the amount of power that he wielded. There were so many other worlds out there, too, and his problems didn’t size up.

It was a good reminder, and he was so lost in thought that he completely missed out on the conversations the others were having. He snapped back into reality when they finally arrived at their destination.

Old ruins. Ancient, really. The remains of a castle that had been completely blown in half by war and years of erosion from the rain. He didn’t really realize just how far they had walked until Merida mentioned that in all her years, she had never seen this place. Scarier still was that her mother nodded in agreement. The wisps were no longer around, so it was all up to their free will now.

What was left of the castle was a basement, which was littered with rubble.

“Well if they brought us here, we might as well investigate,” Merida started, climbing down into the depths.

Aqua sighed heavily, not really liking the idea all that much but this was better than nothing. “I’ll go. Terra, stay with the queen.”

He was left babysitting the queen, who moaned and growled with worry over her daughter exploring such depths. They lowered deep enough that he couldn’t hear either of their words when spoken, but if he didn’t know any better, he’d say they were chattering over a conspiracy based on what they found down there.

The queen then sniffed profoundly. Little whelps escaped her nozzle, until she roared in fear. He didn’t like the sound of it.

“Aqua!”

He saw her blue hair whip around, seeing him from below, and then notice something behind her. Merida screamed. A roar bellowed from the darkness.

A horrifically large black bear with patches of fur missing and broken spears and arrows lodged onto its back, towered over the two women with a snarl so deep it sounded like a curse. This had to be it: the monster bear from the king’s stories, Mor’du.

The princess was quick enough to attack him with her new bow, but that was of little use when it didn’t even pierce his skin.

Aqua yelped a warning at her, to get back. She summoned her Keyblade, and produced a barrier to reject a swipe from Mor’du. Merida scrambled back up the castle walls, Terra pulling her to safety.

Mor’du circled around Aqua, studying her movements as she flipped around him, aiming to take strikes at her but failing each time as she reflected them with her magic. There was something about the movements - far too intelligent for a typical animal.

He was about to yell Aqua’s name again until he saw that she, too, tried to get back up. She threw pot shots aimed at the floor in front of Mor’du, as opposed to firing them directly at him, just to keep him back.

Her hand in Terra’s, he pulled her up, holding her by the waist as though he had nearly lost her until their faces were centimeters apart. She breathed out her adrenaline, and whipped her head back when she heard the bear easily following them.

Terra summoned his Keyblade as well. She conjured a barrier to push the bear back into the castle, and ordered the royal family to get away.

“Keep them safe,” she said to Terra.

“What about you?”

She shot him a look, and she didn’t need words to express what she was thinking. She was perfectly capable of taking care of herself.

“That’s not what I meant,” he said in reply. “I can fight with you.”

“We are _not_ attacking an animal.”

“Aqua, I don’t think that’s a _normal_ bear.” He gritted his teeth. 

Terra didn’t want to be right about that. Mor’du crept from out of the castle ruins and showed off exactly how giant he was when he stood on his hind legs. One of his eyes was scarred shut. The spears sticking out from his back have blackened from so much exposure to the elements. Which was crazy considering that he probably shouldn’t be alive now since bears didn’t live _that_ long.

It must have been Merida’s screaming that forced Aqua to realize that this thing was otherworldly. The queen lunged herself at Mor’du, trying to attack like a bear would - but she was at least half his size.

Aqua cursed to herself, and faced Terra with intent in her eyes. “I need you. Please protect them for me.”

He hesitated. “Be safe.”

Merida had thought to make a run for it, crying out to her mother to get away. They waited for Terra, as he used his Earthsaker to strike the ground, creating wide trenches as a block to stall anyone from pursuing them. With the princess on her mother’s back, the queen waited for him to be finished before bending her front legs as an invitation for to him to ride her as well.

The last thing he saw of the battlefield as she galloped away was Aqua dancing around Mor’du, using her Keyblade to create a cage around him, sealing it with chains that were normally used to contain darkness.

Merida gripped her mother’s fur but she bucked wildly from the unsteadiness of riding a bear’s shoulder. Terra leaned over her to keep her secure, with a mount of fur gripped in his own fingers. The queen ran and ran, until they escaped the mountain they were on, and left the cold and the rain behind.

In a valley, they were able to finally rest. They all agreed to wait for Aqua, and Merida even claimed that the best idea for now was to head back to her castle - they finally have the answer in returning her mother back to normal. But Aqua didn’t come. An hour passed by, and when they only have until the sunrise to fix the queen, these minutes were precious.

This wasn’t normal. She should have been here by now. An image of her alone, injured, and bleeding out waiting for help passed through his mind.

Terra announced that he was going to go back. He said that Merida was smart, resourceful, and courageous enough to handle this from here on out. The princess was reluctant at first but was understanding - not that it was necessary, since they finally heard the buzz of a glider approaching them, with Aqua mounting it. She had a scratch on her arm that she wrapped with a torn hem of her skirt, but otherwise she seemed perfectly fine.

“Is everyone alright?” she asked casually when stepping off. She took a glance over at Terra to see if he was fine, then headed straight for the other two to look for injuries.

Ironically enough, he was probably the one most in pain. He had spent all this time worrying about her so much, did she even spare any thinking about him?

He pushed the thought off of his mind. It wasn’t that he was unimportant to her - she trusted him. She assumed he could take care of himself and that he had the power to look after the princess and the queen. Of course she cared about him.

“Are you okay?” he heard her ask him. They were already paces ahead of him and she had turned around to look back, where he was simply standing there by himself. When he didn’t answer right away, she briskly closed the gap in between them, holding her hand out to gently hold his forearm. “Where are you hurt?”

Inside his chest, where his heart was pounding so hard it could burst. And it could be remedied, if he made her heart jump like this, too. But if he didn’t, then maybe there was no cure for it.

“I’m not hurt.” He tried to sound casual, but she knew him too much to believe him. “Really, I’m perfectly alright. Just worried.”

She nodded. “I get it, but you don’t have to be. We have a solid plan now, and we can fix all of this. You okay to move?”

“Yeah,” he breathed.

“Good.” She smiled. “We’ll both be fine.”

She meant for the Mark of Mastery. But he knew he wasn’t going to be.

 

* * *

They were able to fix it, all within the nick of time. By the sunrise, the queen was human again, her rift between herself and Merida mended. What it took wasn’t a trick or chant, but a compromise - simple enough to say in words, but a terrible mountain to climb when applied to reality. The queen finally admired her daughter for who she was, and Merida owned up to some of the responsibilities that she was burdened with.

Which resulted in the decision not to marry her off to anyone without her own, personal approval.

Not to mention, Mor’du was finally pronounced dead after years of tormenting the people here.

Terra should be feeling accomplished as well, but he couldn’t. Seeing the others get what they wanted - including Aqua, who needed to relax after too many days of worrying about this mission - left him in a state of dissatisfaction. He was the only one with an empty bowl. Aqua smiled to him, whispering “ _we did it_ ” as she wrapped her arm around his, resting her head on his shoulder. He wanted to touch her back, but restrained himself.

They had been awake the entire night, rushing to get the queen back and fighting off the bear that even the king invited them for a celebratory breakfast. But the both of them chose to politely decline the invitation, wishing only for sleep. The irony of the two of them choosing this route meant that Terra had to listen to lewd comments from the others about their bond, even when he went to his bunk alone. But the exhaustion was so demanding that sleep came easy.

It was early afternoon when he finally awoke and bathed himself. He wanted to forget the smell of sheep as soon as possible, so he went ahead to announce to the royal family that he was leaving - without letting her know.

But of course, she would find out, and promptly announced her departure as well. He packed a sack with gifts of appreciation for his service in the castle’s secret passage. It was always customary that they bring Ventus a gift from every world they visit, and this time was no exception. He heard her footsteps approaching. They were now both dressed in their uniforms, looking like proper Keyblade wielders.

She was now fresh and awake, her eyes sparkling like usual, and he felt a tiny sense of resentment at seeing how much more beautiful she looked.

“So...” She sat on a crate, opening a jovial conversation with him as if everything was back to normal. It really wasn’t. “Mor’du used to be human. He was cursed when he wanted all the power in the world. If only the Master had known about him before.”

She stopped a snicker. He knew what she was getting at, considering that he lost count how many lectures he had to endure from the Master about his own pursuit of strength.

“He wouldn’t let me forget. Probably tell me that if I didn’t watch myself, I’d turn into a dark monster that would haunt all of the worlds, yatta yatta yatta.” He forced himself to joke back, and didn’t even think that he sounded convincing. “Now he’ll write about it in a book and use it to warn all of his future deviant students like me.”

Her smile fell. She never liked hearing him talk lowly about himself. “I wanted to apologize, Terra.”

“Come again?” A lump formed so high on his throat that he nearly choked on it. He prayed that she wasn’t going to admit that she remembered the kiss and regretted it.

“I’m sorry I blamed you for the queen turning into a bear. I knew it wasn’t your fault. I’m just... too good with sticking my foot in my mouth, I guess.” She gave a small smile.

That was a relief, at least. He nearly retorted with, _that’s not all you put on your mouth_ but he bit his tongue.

“You don’t have to apologize to me. I’ve lived with you long enough that I’ve seen worse. I know how you get.” He meant it to sound light-hearted, but didn’t have the energy to really convey that.

And since she read him so well, she was sure to hear the tiniest bit of bitterness in his voice. She said nothing. It was likely that she thought he didn’t accept her apology.

“Let’s just go home,” he said, flipping the sack over his shoulder. Without any mission to talk about, he felt bare around her, and needed a distraction.

It was then that Merida and her family bid farewell to the dark-skinned and blue-haired outsiders that graced them with a miracle, and he (finally) got to bask in the vastness of the ocean in between worlds, flying home. He found himself speeding there, unintentionally leaving Aqua lagging behind, even though neither of them were trying to race each other. When she kept up, he went faster.

The Land of Departure was a welcome sight, the splendor of the academy’s architecture dangerously hovering above the crevices of the mountains, held together by large chains. Edgy, but comforting. He landed and didn’t bother to wait for her to arrive, either. He kept a fast pace as he entered the castle. Most people would find it very lavish - it certainly was in comparison to the medieval style of the place Merida would call home. But seeing it helped him to relax his shoulders and take a deep breath. He passed through the lower halls of the first floor, until he found himself in the closest lounge to the entrance.

Ventus arrived there, too, panting as if he’d been running to greet them. “You’re finally back!” His face was a sight for sore eyes.

Terra dropped the sack at a table and pulled out the contents. “A gift for you.”

“A skirt?” Ventus looked through the green plaid fabric, and immediately tried it on over his pants. He waved his hips back and forth so it swished around.

“It’s called a kilt.” He was about to say that it was supposed to be worn with nothing underneath, but when he saw that Ventus brought it high enough to be worn right under the armpits, he decided he’ll surprise him about it later.

The soft clack of footsteps meant that Aqua arrived to the room. She giggled. “It looks good on you, Ven.”

At this point, Ven shuffled his arms inside so that it hung off his shoulders. “It’s nice.” He was always appreciative of everything they gave him, even when he didn’t understand.

After hugging Ventus, she took her place next to Terra. But he kept himself from looking at her too much. “What should we tell the Master?” she asked.

“Everything,” he said in a way to make it sound like it was an obvious answer. He crossed his arms.

“Okay.” She rolled her lips inward, sighing. “I just wanted to check in and see what you thought.”

“Well... that’s what I think.”

She nodded, and patted Ventus on the shoulder. “Okay. I’ll see you upstairs then.”

With that she left.

“Did you guys fight?” Ventus asked, and it was like dropping a porcelain plate in the middle of the quietest dinner party that existed.

“No,” Terra said too quickly. “No. It was just a close call.”

And to end the conversation before too many questions were asked, he ruffled through Ventus’ hair before heading to the second floor of the entrance hall. The stained glass window here was the most impressive, painting part of the floor in brilliant colors. Eraqus waited by the thrones there, and Terra bowed when he stood next to Aqua. They spoke of the mission, both of their successes and of their failures, and how they worked to fix them. The Master found their story amusing, nodding in approval of their work and expressed how proud he was of them both. For all of Aqua’s anxiety over it, it proved to be mostly useless considering how well it was received.

But at least they were home, and were able to resume their normal routines. Studying, sparring, spending leisure time alone and together. Though Terra liked some of that better than others. He just couldn’t stop thinking about what happened, and found that the best remedy was tossing jokes back and forth with Ventus. If Aqua was involved, he kept more to himself, making sure that he responded minimally to her so that she didn’t notice how distressed he was. It was like wearing a mask, where he had to pretend to be a mimic of himself so that she couldn’t see what he was really feeling.

It was definitely harder to do when he was alone with her, which he avoided as much as he could. He’d pull out a book to read so that he wouldn’t be disturbed. He’d make an excuse to leave the room.

But this evening, in the studio room where they stood barefoot over padded floors, they were sparring. And he didn’t have anything to take his eyes off of her. To spar this much when the exam was barely a week away reminded him that he _still_ couldn’t catch up to her.

So now he was alone in experiencing that kiss, and he would probably be left behind in the exam, too.

And this made him _angry_. Seeing her dance and twirl around him, her form perfect as usual and her hair flowing around her face, her waist accentuated by her corset, her legs bare which showed off the silkiness of her skin, thrusting her Keyblade forward whenever he left himself open-

Not remembering anything gave her such an advantage.

It wasn’t fair that he was the only one suffering.

She swerved and there was an opening. He took it, swinging his Keyblade so hard so that he hoped it would throw his rage off of him.

“ _Terra_.” It came out as a warning, like a plea to stop. She was slumped on the ground, her legs bent close to her as she leaned on her hands. She gripped on her arm, where he saw a trickle of blood from where he just hit her.

It was normal in this line of work to have accidents. They hit each other all the time when sparring, it was still a fight after all. They grew resilient to pain, but it was protocol to let each other know when too much damage was being done. And he didn’t mean to hit her this hard or throw her back this much.

“I’m so sorry.” He dismissed his Keyblade and crouched to her, inspecting the blow. He touched the area around the open wound, where it began to bruise red and purple. She winched.

“You’re very distracted,” she said.

“I know, you’re right.” He stopped for a moment. “Wait a minute, that means you are, too. You wouldn’t have allowed such an easy hit.”

“Well, yeah, but...”

He hovered his hand over her arm, casting a Cure, begging that the soft aura of green light would take it all away. He wasn’t the best at magic, but he knew basic things and this didn’t look too bad.

It stopped bleeding, but nothing faded. It wasn’t that terrible a lesion, it should have been gone by now.

“It’s a war wound like all the others,” she said when she saw his face, shrugging. “I’ll wear it with pride.”

He didn’t bother to hide how resentful he sounded. “What does that say about me then?” That he had the power to harm her, but not take care of her.

He stood up and walked away from her, knowing that she was going to follow him.

“I can heal it on my own, it will go away like nothing happened,” she said, as if that was the most of his worries.

“But that’s exactly the point.” He was getting angrier. “I should be able to at least cast a stupid healing spell.”

“The Master isn’t testing your proficiency of spells.”

“I should still be competent enough to be able to-” He whipped around when he said this, looking into her blue eyes, which were worried.

“This is why I was so distracted,” she said. “You’ve been on edge ever since the mission, and you’ve been pushing me away. What’s wrong?”

He tried to steady his breathing but did a poor job of it. He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I... have a lot on my mind.”

“I’m sure, the anticipation must be insane when it’s so close.” That was only partly true, and it was so terrifying to correct her. And damn it, she was stunning when she smiled at him. “Do you want to talk about it? We can go to our spot. You’re free to speak your mind there.”

_You kissed me and I really liked it. And I want to do it again._

He didn’t have the courage to say it. Here he had his fate in his hands, and he could actually do something to make his life better. Or maybe it would only darken his future, if she were to reject him. He wished he could read her mind so he could cup her face and kiss her without having to say anything. Words right now just didn’t make sense, and if they went to the secret spot in the woods they shared together, then he’d be obligated to speak the truth.

“I need time, Aqua.”

“Okay.” Her gaze fell to the floor. She was disappointed, but if she was frustrated she hid it spectacularly well. The sun had completely set by now, and she held her arm again. “I understand. Good night, Terra. I hope you feel better tomorrow.”

He probably wasn’t going to feel better tomorrow. How could he, when sleep just wouldn’t come?

An hour until midnight.

He rummaged in bed, trying to find a comfortable position, but every muscle was tense. He tried reading, but he found himself going over the same lines again and again without progressing. The moon shining through his window was too bright so he closed his curtains and put his pillows over his face. Maybe if it was dark enough, he’d be lulled to sleep.

Midnight.

His mind was racing. He imagined creeping into her room, right now, and confessing how he felt. She’d be embarrassed but delighted. They would share another kiss, and maybe two more, and she could sleep in his bed tonight. And they’d continue to sneak into each other’s rooms in the dead of the night where no one else would have to know. They could practice what to do with their hands and their bodies.

Or she could shut it all down and tell him that they were never to speak about it again.

An hour past midnight. Why did he have to obsess over things?

He sat up and ripped the bed sheets off of him. Maybe a walk would help him calm down.

The quietness of the castle was peaceful and still, and being the only one awake at the time made him feel like he didn’t have a life to solve in this moment. And he hoped this feeling would last long.

The stars shone brightly, where the breeze caressed his face. He stared upward as he sat on the stairs leading to the entrance of the castle, noting areas where the sky was darker than the rest. He was so small, his problems so tiny and so nonexistent to the millions of people out there who maybe had it worse. If they could survive their dilemmas, then maybe he could, too.

A squirrel casually strolled on the terrace in front of him, stopping every now and then to gauge its safety in its surroundings. In the dead of night no less, where predators were probably watching it.

This squirrel had more spine than him.

“Some brave warrior I am,” he scoffed, running his fingers through his hair.

The squirrel rubbed its face and scurried over, hiding itself behind a bush. Terra was lone again, but he soon realized he really wasn’t. He did a double take at the sight ahead of him. There, right before the forest that led to several trails, the training area, and their favorite place to star gaze, glided a soft gold light that fluttered, traveling around like it didn’t notice him at all.

He blinked and rubbed his eyes. He had never seen something like this in the Land of Departure, and couldn’t fathom what it was. It felt very much like meeting a will o’ the wisp for the first time, knowing there were forces outside of his existence who worked their own magic. Was this the same thing?

Unlike a wisp, this entity wasn’t friendly, but it wasn’t stand-offish either. It was just there, like it was lost.

He approached it, only to find that there were others near it, spreading over the fields that he knew so well, he could practically walk them blind. He pinched himself to make sure he was awake. They were still there.

They started to flutter away, as if they were going to enjoy their time whether he was gaping at them or not. And he could admire them from afar, or follow them and change his fate.

It was probably much healthier for him to stop tormenting himself. So he went after them, wondering if providence was waiting for him wherever they were going to take him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **To be continued...**
> 
>  
> 
> This chapter references Pixar's Brave (2012).


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